Wednesday, April 30, 2008

wednesday 30/04/2008 (no more yahoozee)

Mon Gbona Feli Feli
Bi Amala to ji na gan gan
Dont hate me cause am hotter than you...

just realised that my melancholic attitude was due to the fact that i
was comparing myself again...yes it does happen abi...but if you do it
too much you tend to put yourself down...think about it,no matter what
you've got (material position) someone has got more...something keeps
everyone in the ranks and thats our brain,we use very little of it...
and i tend to improve on that atleast if i dont have the car yet i have
lofty ideas that could move the earth...

i was so happy when i realised that this was it...the secret that all
frustrated people out there dont f said a while ago, in
this race,we are in competition against ourselves and more so its a
marathon not a hundred meter dash...yeah there's the God factor but even
i think its in The book somewhere that if you just SAY to this mountain
MOVE,giving the realization that you think,you say and you act...simple...
so its all about you...figuratively...and dont say its my selfish self
thats speaking cause i know u understand...

Also just realised that i quote a lot from the bible, not a bad thin abi,
well to you, cause i can only recite about 1% of the quran...pathetic for an
alhaji to be...this i definately have to work on.yeah yeah i know my strenghts
and my perceived weaknesses,couldnt possible list them here could i?
okay lets see, there i weaknesses i couldnt possibly do anything about like
my height and there are strenghts that you think are trivial like my grey hair \
at 28yrs old,all of brand me abi?

just realised that its all about me,if its going to work,i'll have to make
it more tears,yeah am guilty too,i cry...ehn am a big
i cry to when things arent just going my way,they also help in realising my
pent up frustration with anything and everything, i also sulk too...which angers
mum alot...

just realised that i only have the map to my life although i havent figured
the "X" yet put am making discoveries...i have tried to bully people into
joining me on this treasure search and it has been s said
if people need you they'll do anything to find dont go out of your way
to make them like you...nobody could ever see the map of your life and understand
it except i wont live my life for if you're interested in what
you see join the band wagon...

just realised that to make it in my life you've got to break all the rules,and there
are lots more i want to break,the gist of all this is that i just have to believe in
myself,my map, i might tweak it if i want to but only me can sell the brand new me...
i've got to stay really positive also,and keep persevering,just think about it...macy
gray doesnt have a good voice,but she's got a grammy or

so how did i do this month ending hopefully on a high beloved chelsea's
champions league final qualifications...amin o...

This month i felt the disconect with God and it was as powerful as ever,cause i dont have
any excuse for saying my 5 dailies,going to asalatu,tahajjud,zakat...infact i should be
i spent a lot of time on things that wont increase my market value in any my spirituality
quotient is way low.
Almighty Allah, i,ve got great plans for May...please let them be fulfilled and i'll serve you
as best as i will...amin o

so to the next goal, i went for only one or two classes out of a possible 8 in the month,i fail wolefully
and i'll probably fail at this rate and a lot of people will be pissed, just that like in some instances
in life,when you're doing something new,the excitement curve just rises steeply, pans out...thats when we
become bored, and now rises slowly..thats when persistence comes in...just wish we could start mysql cause
of my business...

talking about my business, i think i did a lot more better this month,i bet a lot more people know about my
mobile dating service now,quite a few people have used the cbox,even though i've still not gotten round to
advertising again...thanks all,but obviously i'll still have to work more,use every opportunity to promote my
business...believe in what i do more

"so May,your path be rough"...said mr tai solarin of blessed memory...i would add if you wldnt mind sir,"so it can
bring out the best in you".so what do i have for may,apart from being positive,try to promote my business more,live
my life for me...
i'll also be adding the second "conversation with a babe", i got to chat with zephi this time...
very insightful and funny...

i'm also having a small one month self help/boot camp for all dem shy guys out there cause
as patra said "i dont want a shy guy, i just want a fly guy", so am going to help you expand your possiblities in
meeting the woman of your dreams,she could just be right beside u...u know what we'll go through it together, as i'll
be writing my own experiences here...
all you have to do is simple...u just have to talk...just say something to the next babe you see...
and we'll do it in bits,you sha didnt start walking one day, i'll write the timetable on the can join the
class anytime...and u'll be kind, just tell someone about the blog

for the ladies out there,since i dont want to run a site that sees women as the lesser sex, i'll also be running series of
articles about attracting Mr right to you, and no juju is

whew,i've written a lot abi,tomorrow's May Day o,lets all go to the stadium and march...or watch it on the

just got back from a sendforth...
heard am coming to work tomorrow

Monday, April 28, 2008

Billionaire Bachelors

So you think am still a small boy abi, see the dudes i roll with...
by the way,we're all still

Roustam Tariko, Russia
Net worth: $3.5 billion
Age 46. Single. 3 children
Tariko made his first fortune creating Russia's first up-market vodka, called Russian Standard. He then moved into consumer credit. But it is less how he makes his money and more how he spends it that we find appealing. He was the first in Russia to buy a $500,000 Maybach automobile, has a house in Sardinia and a private Boeing 737 to jet him there. Plus, he loves to throw a good party.

Ronald Burkle, U.S.
Net worth: $3.5 billion
Age 55. Divorced. 3 children
Supermarket mogul with baggage. Separated from wife Janet in 1992 and reunited with her five years later, when they signed a settlement that granted her $30 million if they ever parted ways again. She left him in 2002 and later sued for $1 billion. He won the suit but lost his privacy, as 5,000-page divorce record was unsealed. Burkle runs with an A list crowd, including good friend Bill Clinton and actress Kate Hudson, whom he brought to a Forbes-sponsored poker game last year.

Prince Albert von Thurn und Taxis, Germany
Net worth: $2.3 billion
Age 24. Single.
The world's third-youngest billionaire, the prince lives in a family castle with his mother and older sister. A race car driver, he tours with a German auto-racing league.

Fahd Hariri, Lebanon
Net worth: $2.3 billion
Age 27. Single.
Youngest son of slain Lebanese Prime Minister Rafik Al-Hariri, Fahd runs a fledgling design business in Paris where he, his mother and sister Hind live. Older brother Saad is the Lebanese parliamentary majority leader.

Charles Dunstone, U.K.
Net worth: $1.8 billion
Age 44. Single.
The British entrepreneur who runs $8 billion (sales) mobile-phone retailer Carphone Warehouse seems to have a soft side. Dunstone is said to give every employee the day off on birthdays and sends a cake. That is probably one reason why the company has been named one of Britain's best workplaces for the past two years. An avid yachtsman, Dunstone recently won the New York Challenge sailing cup.

Mark Zuckerberg, U.S.
Net worth: $1.5 billion
Age 23. Single.
Tech's newest golden boy is the youngest billionaire on the planet, as well as a bit of a philosopher. He founded social-networking site Facebook in February 2004 from his Harvard dorm room. Today Facebook boasts 66 million active users. According to his own Facebook profile, some of Zuckerberg's interests include "breaking things, revolutions and eliminating desire for all that really doesn't matter." Favorite band: Green Day.

David Ross, U.K.
Net worth: $1.4 billion
Age 42. Divorced. 1 child.
Ross co-founded Carphone Warehouse, the European mobile-phone retailer, with school friend Charles Dunstone in 1989. An arts lover, he stages operas at his weekend home in the country. In fact, he built a concert hall on his front lawn for these occasions. In his London home, he has studios for three portrait painters to use

Richard Li, Hong Kong
Net worth: $1.4 billion
Age 41. Single.
Youngest son of Hong Kong's richest man, Li Ka-shing. Li borrowed money from his father and managed to amass his own 10-figure fortune. To find out more about him, click on his personal Web site at, which details Li's business successes as well as his interests, which include diving and flying.

Sergei Polonsky, Russia
Net worth: $1.2 billion
Age 35. Single. 2 children.
A former architecture student, Polonsky is now one of the highest-profile real estate developers in Moscow. (His Mirax Group built the 1,300-foot Moscow City tower.) An extreme-sports lover, he hoped to fly on the International Space Station but was rejected because of his height. At 6 feet 4 inches, he is too tall.

Peter Thiel, U.S.
Net worth: $1.2 billion
Age 40. Single.
Thiel has been at the fore of some of Silicon Valley's biggest phenomena. He co-founded PayPal, which he sold to eBay in 2002 for $1.5 billion. Two years later, he became Facebook's first outside investor, putting in $500,000. He enjoys running, hiking and surfing. A chess prodigy, he was ranked seventh in the U.S. at age 12.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

5 Sure-Fire Ways to Spark Her Interest

By David Wygant

Most men think that they need a clever line to approach a woman. But through all my years of coaching men and women, I have found that it is not what you say that's important, but how you approach.

Most women put more importance on visual clues to assess a man's character. They don't care what you say, as long as you say it without hesitation and with authority. Unfortunately, most men don't know this, so they walk over to a woman like a wounded animal expecting to be rejected. When you approach like a wounded animal, you will be rejected every single time -- no matter how clever a remark you may have.

With 80 percent of human interaction based on nonverbal body language, what is a man to do? The key to impressing her right off the bat is to be different from all the other men who are approaching her that evening.

Here a few sure-fire ways to make your approach more powerful and convincing, even
if you are not sure what you are going to say:

Walk with confidence. When you see a woman that you are attracted to, walk right over. Stand up straight and walk over slowly but with confidence. Make sure your chest is puffed out and your posture is looking strong and not slumped over. Keep eye contact as you approach. Do not hesitate. Most men linger in the background before they approach, then, when you finally do approach, she is quick to turn her back on you. The reason is that you did not exude confidence. Most women notice who is observing them.

When you do not approach within seconds of spotting her, you might as well go home.

avoid being seen with the drunken testosterone pack of males. One of the biggest turn-offs for women is the "male pack" -- you with five of your buddies high-fiving each other, drinking and checking out other women. When you approach a woman with your buddies waiting on the sideline, she will impulsively reject you in front of the pack to avoid being scrutinized later. Break away from the male pack and find one other guy to go out on the town with. Save the male bonding for a sports bar.

Dress for a strong appearance. Make sure you're not sabotaging your efforts with your attire. If you look like a slob, it will not matter what your body language says, because you will look like every other man who put no thought into what he was going to wear that night to attract women. Buy clothing that makes you stand out from the rest of the men. Find a cool pair of jeans and some great shirts that give you an edge, so when you walk in with the right body language, women will see you. Keep in mind that shoes are really important too, so find a few pairs that look great on you.
Create a spark within her. Most men's conversation will center on being agreeable and non-confrontational in the hopes that she likes you.

In the mind of a woman, playing it safe equals boring! You need to spark her interest by being a bit disagreeable. For example, you get into a conversation about summer movies and she says that "Spiderman III" was her favorite Spidey movie so far. Instead of being agreeable,look her right in the eye with confidence and tell her that she is so wrong -- the first Spiderman was superior. Then proceed to tell her why you think so. This will create a fun, friendly, flirtatious verbal sparring, which will create a spark in her brain. She will realize that you are not a pushover like most men and attraction will start to form in her head.
Maintain some tension.

Flirting with women is all about gathering information, so the better listener you are, the better your chances. When you call her, you will have more things to talk about. Before calling a woman, I think about everything she said and then I pick the most juicy topic or opinion and challenge her with it. For example, going back to the example of "Spiderman III," I would text her the next day: "I was thinking U + I need 2 re-watch Spiderman. U R so wrong. Name the time + place + I'll bring the DVD."
She will immediately respond to the challenge and text you back. You have just learned the secret of re-creating the tension that you shared with her. Plus, you are being totally unlike every other guy who waits three days to call her and schedule a predictable dinner date.

Dating Coach, Blogger and Author David Wygant has been featured on more than 2,000 radio and television shows including Dateline, CBS Good Morning, and MTV. Get more sex and dating tips on David's interactive blog at

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

10 Tips for Approaching Women

Most guys get caught up in guessing what to say; here's what they really should do

By David Wygant

What do you do when you see a woman you are attracted to? Do you run and hide? Do you use some canned line that you read on the Internet? Do you stand there in fear trying to think of the right thing to say? What is the right thing to do?
When approaching a woman, most guys make the mistake of thinking too much about what to say. They believe there's one magic line that will work in all situations. They rehearse this magic line, and when they deliver it, they hope the woman will become instantly attracted to them.
Unfortunately, rarely does this approach work -- because most of what you say is irrelevant. To catch a woman's attention, it is all about the confidence you display when approaching her.
Here are 10 surefire ways to intrigue her every time:
1. Observe something. Make a comment about something you observe in the environment. This is especially effective at the grocery store. For example, if she is ordering a turkey sandwich, ask her if the turkey is good here.
Make your comment immediate to the situation
Make your comment immediate to the situation and it will seem perfectly natural. No matter where you are, there is always something interesting to comment on.
2. Smile. This shows her that you are friendly and confident. A genuine smile not only feels good to you, but will put her at ease while creating openness in the interaction -- a requirement for building rapport.
3. Do not hesitate. If you hesitate in your approach, this tells her that you are not feeling confident -- an immediate turn-off. When you see her, walk over to her within a short period of time (the three-second rule). Show her you are a man who knows what he wants and goes after it.
4. Positive body language. If you approach hunched over with your head down, you are sending negative information about yourself, which makes you dead in the water before you begin. Stand up straight, with shoulders back and chest out, and use a firm yet relaxed walk.
5. Not too fast. If you walk over too fast, you could likely trigger her internal alarm. A calm, casual approach is usually the best way to make her feel at ease with you.
6. Keep eye contact. Never be the first to break eye contact when you approach. If you do, this sends the message that you are not feeling good about approaching. When you use strong eye contact, she will feel more drawn to you. With practice, you can master this.
7. Listen up. Make sure you pay careful attention to what she says. Do not have your response pre-thought out. Women love a man who pays attention to the details of what she says. If you start throwing out random words, she will lose interest fast.
8. Do not fidget. Fidgeting after you approach is distracting and shows you are uncomfortable. If you communicate that you are uncomfortable, she will feel uncomfortable, too, and will close up. Practice being aware of your movements. Pay attention to those movements, or lack of movements, that communicate comfort and confidence.
9. Lighten your tone of voice. The tone of your voice is a very powerful tool. Approaching her in a light and playful tone is one of the best ways to start. You could also begin in a serious tone, accusing her of something like "
I hope you saved some turkey for me
I hope you saved some turkey for me," followed by a quick smile to let her know you are joking. Practice playing with your vocal tone with your friends -- notice the different reactions you get when you say the exact same thing using varied tones and fluctuations.
10. Lean away from her. A man who leans in too far when he talks often makes a woman feel crowded. A better approach is to lean away from her slightly. This lets her know that you respect her space, boundaries, and are comfortable with yourself.
The key to making these tips work for you is putting them into practice! Practice these tips and see the reaction you get. When you put them all together, you will be surprised at their power.

Dating Coach, Blogger and Author David Wygant has been featured on more than 2,000 radio and television shows including Dateline, CBS Good Morning, and MTV. Get more sex and dating tips on David's interactive blog at

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

10 Signs You're Being Needy

By David Wygant
Special to Yahoo! Personals

In my ten years of coaching men and women on the perils of dating and relationships, the one journey women tell me they never want to go on again is meeting and hanging out with the "needy and clingy" man.
Nothing turns women off more than a guy who is really needy.
Nothing turns women off more than a guy who is really needy.
Now, I can practically hear men's voices protesting from everywhere, saying "But David, there are a lot of needy women too!" This article is not about them... it's about you.
Below are ten signs that you are being needy. Remember you are trying to attract women, not turn them off. So if you suffer from any of these signs of neediness, you need to immediately stop those actions.
1. You just walked a woman to her door at the end of a date. Instead of kissing her, you ask her if she had a good time. Women are attracted to confident men. They don't want to have to tell you that they had a good time on a date... they want you to be secure enough in yourself to assume that they had a good time.
2. You called a woman last night and she has not yet called you back, so you either email her or call her again to ask her if she received your message. If you want to push her away, this is one of the best ways to get her to quickly run away from you.
3. You start texting a woman you just began dating five or six times a day. You are over-texting her. You don't need to check in every two hours. That's a sign of neediness and clingy behavior that turns women off.
4. You miss a call on your cell phone from a phone number that you don't recognize. You call the woman you're dating, and to whom you talked just two hours before, and ask, "Did you just call me?" This kind of behavior is going to push and scare her away.
5. You agree with everything the woman you're dating says. Women are not looking for a man who agrees with everything they say. Women want a man who challenges them and from whom they can learn. When a man agrees with everything a woman says, he is telling her that he'll do anything to have a relationship (which is another sign of being needy).
6. The woman you're dating is out for the evening with her friends. She promised to call you when she got home. It's getting late and you haven't heard from her. You just can't resist and you call her cell phone several times until she answers it. This is a sign of being needy and insecure. She's out with her friends... not out with another guy. Let her have some personal space and she'll respect you more.
7. You are too available. If you have plans with a friend, keep those plans even if the woman you're dating asks you to do something that night. Women don't want men who are like a 7-Eleven -- convenient and ready 24/7.
8. You try to please a woman all the time. I'm all about men doing nice things for women, but she has to earn it. Some men will let a woman walk all over them, and then continue to be a sponge and allow it over and over again. Stand up for yourself and she'll respect you more. Letting a woman walk all over you is a clear sign to her that you're needy.
9. Don't be afraid to challenge a woman. If you don't agree with something a woman says, don't just sit there and agree with her thinking it's what she wants. Women are looking for someone who is going to stimulate their mind... not bore them. Women are not turned on by men they can completely control.
10. Be the man! Have a plan and stick with it. Women like men who plan out evenings of fun.
Don't always ask a woman what she wants to do. Listen to what she likes when you're having conversations with her
Don't always ask a woman what she wants to do. Listen to what she likes when you're having conversations with her, then come up with a fun plan that you will already know she'll like. A needy man will do whatever a woman wants. A man of action will create plans for what they will do. Being a man of action will lead her to find you a lot more attractive in the long run.
Women are attracted to men who are confident and real. Women want to feel like you need them... but only after you already have your own life, your own ambitions, and your own goals.
The moment a man starts getting too clingy, a woman will run for the hills. This is exactly like how you will pull back from a woman who becomes clingy and needy.

Monday, April 21, 2008

7 Dating Ups and Downs

How to ride the rollercoaster

By David Wygant

Dating is a process a lot of us really can live without. It's an emotional rollercoaster that can drive you to drink four year-old bottles of Mike's Hard Lemonade from the back of your refrigerator.
Here's my list of the top ups and downs of dating -- and how to feel better about them:
1. Stop the mental post-date recap abuse. You went out with somebody with whom you thought you had a connection, and it turns out you didn't. So now you're going to mentally torture yourself for the next four days trying to figure out what you said wrong. You'll even torture all your friends asking them what you could have done differently.
The post-date recap is a form of mental torture.
The post-date recap is a form of mental torture. You will never know what that other person is thinking unless they call you. If they don't call, it really does mean that he or she is just not that into you (which is about the only good advice from that ridiculously stupid book).
2. We made out in the parking lot and they never called again. Making out is fun! You needed it. They needed it. Don't beat yourself up that you did it, just realize you did it. Be okay with it. It was a great date. You were in the moment, and you experienced something that you wanted to do.
3. I texted them the next morning and said, "I had a great time last night," and they never texted back. So what? You had a great time last night. So did they. They just woke up, and their post-date recap was different from yours. They probably had a good time, but when they thought about it, the chemistry and the "it" factor wasn't there. It's not about you. At least you were honest. So you did all you can do.
4. Should I have said something different in my voicemail message? You left a voicemail message and now you're replaying it in your head a thousand times. "Should I have said 'Last night was fun' with more enthusiasm? Is that why she's not calling me back?"
When it comes to voicemail messages, the shorter the better.
When it comes to voicemail messages, the shorter the better. From an old sales technique, I always prefer to say, "Last night was fun. I have something really funny to share with you the next time we speak." That's it -- it creates a little bit of intrigue, a little bit of mystery and no mental torture.
5. Who cares what they think? You left the above voicemail message without knowing if you'll ever see them again, and they don't call you back. You start to think, "Now they know that I like them, and they don't like me." So what? Is it better to just sit there and hope and pray they call? I always believe in being honest. You've got to do what feels right for you.
6. Stop giving your power away to one person. If a two-hour date can cause you to give away all your power and confidence, then you need to learn to embrace yourself and love yourself more. This is just one person you went out with for two hours. They don't know what an amazing person you are. The only thing they know is the person they sat across from at the table. Whether they choose to hang with you again isn't the issue. The issue is that one person does not determine your worthiness. You've got to toughen your skin.
Rejection is what dating is all about
Rejection is what dating is all about; you can't take it personally. If I go out with someone and I have a great time but they never want to see me again, I'm still a great person the next day.
Want some tips about dealing with dating rejection? See them here
7. In order to feel better about dating, you need to think abundance. Just because you think you like somebody and they don't call you back, this is not the last person in the world you're going to meet. In order to be a successful dater, you need to practice abundance. The power of abundance is training your mind to realize that if it doesn't work out with one person (or 10 people), there are plenty of other people out there who do want to hang out with a fantastic person like you.

Dating Coach, Blogger and Author David Wygant has been featured on more than 2,000 radio and television shows including Dateline, CBS Good Morning, and MTV. Get more sex and dating tips on David's interactive blog at

Friday, April 18, 2008

1 Trick To Eliminate Approach Anxiety

One time when I was in High School, there
was this girl...

She was a pretty girl. Blonde and bubbly
and a lot of fun. She was the type of
girl who really lit up a room the moment
she walked in.

This girl also went to my church. So between
school and mass, I had plenty of opportunities
to approach her.

But I didn't.

Then, one day, we were partnered in a class
and got to talking. As I walked her to her
next class, she began lamenting the fact that
she didn't get to go to the winter dance,
which had just passed the weekend before.
Turns out no one asked her!

When I told her I didn't go either, she asked
me "Why not?" to which I replied "I didn't
have a date."

Then she said (and I'll never forget this)
"Well, if you had asked me, I'd have gone
with you."

"Really?" I said.

"Yeah, in fact I was hoping you would, but
you never seemed that interested in me."

When this happened, I was FLOORED. Here was
a beautiful girl, who would have been delighted
to go to a school dance with me - and I was
finding out much too late to do anything about

All because I was too afraid to approach her.

I'm not alone. So many guys suffer from the
"Approach Anxiety" fear.

How many times have you let your chance with
a girl pass you by because you were too afraid
to talk to her?

More than you can count, I'm willing to bet!

The cold, hard facts are, if you want to have
true success with women:

* You need to meet lots of them.
* You need to have no fear of rejection.
* You need to be able to approach a woman
the moment you see her.
* You need to be able to engage her instantly
in conversation.
* You need to have powerful confidence in
* You need to be able to take action when
opportunity presents itself.

If you can do all these things, you can attract
any woman you want.

Joseph Matthews

Bizlancer, Inc.
8350 Wilshire Blvd.
Suite 200
Beverly Hills, CA 90211

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Kylie: Motherhood may not be for me

thought every young lady's dream was to marry a guy and then have kids but...
Pop princess Kylie Minogue has admitted she may never have children.
Minogue, who is 40 next month, said that although she dreams of having a family she sometimes believes it is "not the right path" for her.
She told the German edition of Vogue: "I never had the feeling I was made for a conventional marriage with a house in the suburbs.
"Media interest in 'supermothers', who are simultaneously on stage and bringing up children, is understandable. But for many that is too much of a good thing.
"There are also artists such as Debbie Harry or Dolly Parton who have managed to have an unbelievable career without a family.
"Above everything else, it comes down to how much love you have in you and if you are ready to give that love."
She added: "How things will turn out for me with regards to family I simply can't yet say."
Minogue promised a change of image for her new tour, which kicks off in Paris next month.
She said: "The showgirl and feathers are behind me. I want a new direction. Jean Paul Gaultier is designing my costumes for the tour - all couture."

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Why Does It Work For Everyone Else But You?

Sometimes people think that my tactics work for
everyone else BUT them.

Like they are some "special case" cursed with

But the truth is, they aren't! If you're not
getting results, it's because you're doing something

Take this story for example...



I was reading your email, and I am interested
in your book. My question to you is, first of
all, how BIG is the book (how many pages) ?

Secondly, I just wanted to say that I've been
reading dating ebooks from other people's products
for years now, and I actually STILL don't have
any success.

And to top it off, I think of myself as a catch...
so I don't understand why I can't meet women Or
worst off, why it SEEMS like the techniques,
"work for everybody else, but they just don't
work for me."

This makes me feel like there's no hope and
purpose to even read.

My third question is this: I live in Manhattan,
NYC and I am trying to learn how to meet women
on the streets because I see TONS and TONS of
attractive and available women on the streets
all the time....

But the problem is that they're always WALKING,

I don't know how to go about ANYTHING with these
women. It's almost like you have to chase them
if you wanna talk to them....

Another obstacle that I find is that, I don't
want to scare them. I figure a strange man
walking up to her on the street will scare her,
and scaring her,,,, scares ME.... will you're
product get me to a point where I can do this??

I really wanna become the guy that literally has
TONS and TONS of hot women all over him, and I'm
really willing to do WHATEVER it takes to do it...
but I just can't get it to WORK... Literally....

I keep running into a wall somewhere... I'm not
the type of guy who goes to bars, and I really
don't know where else to go to meet women, EXCEPT
on the STREETS. When I say on the streets I mean
in public, like walking down the street, sitting
on a park bench, standing in front of a store
smoking a cigarette, etc....

I am actively trying to get this handled... not like
these guys who just read stuff and then sit around
and not do anything. I actually made a committment
to myself to go outside, EVERYDAY, and walk the
streets talking to women. I brought a tiny journal
so I can journal my experieces and results, so I
have the GUTS to do pretty much ANYTHING, but like
I said, I keep running into a bunch of, "NOs."

For example, I walked up to about 25 women over a
period of days, and documented what happened, and
I more or less asked most of them if they were
single and ALL of them virtually said, NO they
aren't, and kept moving.... then I asked a few
women who were random strangers, "Do you wanna have
sex??" And pretty much got a few no's also. That's
what I mean, when I say my efforts seem to be
getting me nowhere... I stuck with it for about 2
maybe 3 weeks, then I pretty much just stopped.
That was about 2 and a 1/2 months ago.

Amin, NYC, 25.

MY RESPONSE:>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Oh, dear, dear Amin... you're doing some things
right, but other things very, very WRONG.

And you don't even have my book! No wonder you're
frustrated. :-(

Okay, let's begin with the good stuff...

First of all, I want to commend you on having the
commitment to make this work, and actually go out
and meet women.

THAT is one of the hardest things to do - actually
get off your butt and start talking to girls!

If you can do that, you're halfway to where you need
to be.

You also seem to have some self-esteem going. You
feel you're a catch, which is good. Guys who don't
feel worthy of women have a hard time getting them.

You are also making time to get out of the house
and meet people. This is great! You realize that
you can't meet women sitting in a dark corner of
your room, so you're doing something to change that.

All of these are good things.

Now, onto the BAD stuff...

First of all - meeting women on the street is a
tough way to start out.

Having been to New York many times, I realize that
there are gobs and gobs of amazing women on the
streets, since New Yorkers tend to WALK a lot.

But as you're finding out, it is very hard to
approach women on the streets!

Unless you get them at a crosswalk or someplace
where they've stopped briefly, it is hard to
approach them.

Seriously - the best way I've found to do street
approaches is to actually FOLLOW the woman to where
she's going, and then approach her once she's there.

But this can really take you out of your way,
and some guys feel like a "stalker" doing it.

What you have to realize is that it's best to go
somewhere to meet women that makes things easy
on you.

Instead of prowling the streets, go someplace you
enjoy going - a coffee shop, a book store, a theater,
Manhattan has a billion of these places.

Go to Times Square at lunch time. Go to the Park.
Go places where women HANG OUT instead of WALK.

This makes approaching way easier.

Also - make meeting women part of your life. So
when you're going to the grocery store, or dropping
off your dry cleaning - or WHATEVER - if you see an
opportunity with a woman, you go for it!

So that's about where you meet women, let's talk
about the HOW.

Seriously - I don't know what "dating books" you've
been reading, but if you're going up to girls and

"Are you single?"


"Do you want to have sex?"

Right off the bat, it's no wonder you are meeting
with frustration.

Neither of these are good ways to approach women!

Bad, bad Amin!

When you approach a woman, you don't want to come
off TOO sexual. Asking her if she's single or
if she wants to boink you before any trust or
comfort is built up on her part is a very bad

Instead, you want to start off light, and engage
her in a conversation that allows her to experience
feelings of trust and comfort with you.

The more comfortable she is talking to you, the
more willing she'll be to give you her number or
go out on a date.

Remember: especially in a city like New York, 90%
of your beginning game is convincing girls you're
a nice, normal guy and not a weirdo loser.

So if you approach women the way I tell you to in
my book, you BYPASS the rejection phase by engaging
them in nice, normal conversation.

Then, during that conversation, you create emotional
connections that lead to you asking for (and getting)
the date.

Remember - approaching women won't SCARE them unless
you're being scary. Coming off too strong or saying
the wrong things will creep any woman out.

But if you approach them the RIGHT WAY, they will not
only be fine with it, they will actually WELCOME
you talking to them - because women love it when
they meet great guys and not creeps!

Joseph Matthews

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Dating Tips For Busy Men...

Out of all the obstacles for dating, the
biggest one is being TOO BUSY.

The stresses of Modern Life can really become
overwhelming. We have to go to work. We have
to pick up the groceries. We have to help

our best friend move into a new place. We have
to take the car in for a tune up...

Before you know it, your responsibilities pile
up so quickly, something has to go by the wayside
to make time for you to take care of the important

And your SOCIAL LIFE is usually the first casualty.

Before long, you just start thinking to yourself
"I just don't have time for women right now."
And you go on with your life, too busy to

even think about it.

You let untold opportunities pass you by, as
your mind focuses on annother thing.

But then, suddenly, one day, you realize you're
LONELY. That you want a great woman in your
life. However, you're STILL just as busy as
always. And now, trying to find a woman - on
top of everything else - makes you even BUSIER.

So your busy schedule, coupled with the hardships
of dating, such as flaky women, rejection, late
nights out at the clubs, and so forth - begins to
wear on you.

So what's a busy guy to do, if he still wants
to find a great woman?

Well, here are a few tips...

First of all, look at what's making you so busy!
Often times, the stuff that takes up so much of
your time are the little things that aren't that

Things like doing laundry, washing your car,
grocery shopping, going to the bank, etc. are
all examples of the little things.

Sure, they are important! And they need to be
done. But there's lots of little things that
you can put off or get other people to take
care of for you.

Sometimes you can find a service that actually
delivers your groceries to your home, so you
don't have to go to the store.

There are full service laundromats where you can
drop off your clothes and have someone else wash
them for you.

There are lots of other services out there nowadays
that can make your life much easier by taking care
of the little things for you.

But more than that, it's important to set aside
at least 1-2 days a week where you do NOTHING
but things you want to do.

People need free time. A time to relax! So if
you're not taking at least one day a week just
for yourself, you're going to burn out. Use that
day to go out and meet some new women, or go on
a date.

Also - use passive, convenient methods to meet
new women while you are busy! Internet dating
is a great example of this. You can go on

an internet dating website, and create a profile,
and when you have a few extra minutes during your
day, hop on the computer and start emailing some

Before long, you'll be getting dates set up even
WHILE you are busy!

What's more, get personal business cards made up,
with your name, phone number, email address, and
MySpace page on it. (If you don't have a MySpace
page, go there now and create one. it's free and

takes no time at all.)

When you meet a girl you like throughout your day,
hand her one of your cards, and TELL HER to add you
as a friend on MySpace. Every girl nowadays has
MySpace, or Facebook, so this will help you keep in

touch with them.

There are lots of things a busy guy can do to keep
his social life alive and well. He just has to
remember to find the time to DO them.

Joseph Matthews

Bizlancer, Inc.
8350 Wilshire Blvd.
Suite 200
Beverly Hills, CA 90211

Saturday, April 12, 2008

How To Attract Women By Being Natural

Most guys are either too nervous or too fake when approaching ladies. But states have significant drawbacks. The only way to defeat all those problems and have success every time is to act ina natural way. Easier said than done... but, using some of the skills I can teach you, perfectly doable.
In the Wish-I-Forgot mists of time...
I want you to take a moment and step into that time machine we call memory, and travel back to the first time you approached a girl.
Or the first time you talked to a girl with romantic intent - maybe calling her off your junior high phone list, whatever.
Now, fine-tune that machine and don't glaze over a thing - get deeper than the facts and acts, examine the emotions and colors?
What do you see?
Does it, perhaps, involve sweaty palms and a clumsy tongue?
Eyes cast downward and body twitchy?
Thought so.
Now, much less taxing, think back to the most RECENT encounter you've had with a woman.
Your mom doesn't count.
What was it like?
Was it similar to your first in any way?
Did you get jittery, even if only for a second?
Did you TALK to her while nervous?
That ain't good.
The problem with nerves
We ALL get nervous occasionally - usually in a nice simple relationship to our experience and her attractiveness.
It doesn't take a genius to figure out that nervousness isn't a good thing - in fact, it's about the WORST thing you can carry into a pick-up. Any chance of being thought of as confident or together is gone, instantly.
Now, dealing with it isn't as easy as realizing it's a problem.
Now the REAL nut is, nerves aren't the only thing you have to worry about.
Playing the game?
Lots of guys have come up with their own ways to push the nerves to the side - whether it's putting on a different persona, psyching themselves up, getting into a war mentality or what-have-you.
True, this works a little better than the big stutter - since atleast you're making contact.
But also true, if you are acting differently from your normal,non-flirting self, a woman will know it.
And unless you've got an indiscriminately randy lady on your hands,that false front is ALWAYS going to cause problems.
That's why it ain't enough to simply be RELAXED, you've also got to be NATURAL.
Act naturally
The biggest key, of course, is defeating your nerves.
One of the BEST methods I've found is through a little self-guided meditation.
I'm not going to give away all my secrets, BUT I can tell you the basics.
Once you've got yourself in the right state, you call up both your nervous emotions, and then your positive relaxed ones.
Then, you CONSUME your negative thoughts with your positive ones.
The result is, whenever you start to get those butterflies, you've conditioned yourself to call up POSITIVE RELAXED states.
Now, that might seem like the toughest part, and indeed, for you it might be.
Lose the mask
But if you've developed a player mode to help get rid of your flutters, than deprogramming this damaging behavior might take even more time.
Why? Because, in comparison to your earlier attempts, it's done the job. Sure, it actually hurts in the larger scheme, but you're used to thinking of it as something that works (albeit in a scattershot way).
When you encounter a stumbling block, you're going to be REALLY tempted to revert.
You've created a comfort around this persona, and UNLESS you concentrate, your head is going to keep returning to it.
Unlike with nerves, which has NEVER had any positive reinforcement.
So now, let's work on CONVINCING yourself that a NATURAL approach is the way to go.
Role-play time... don't enjoy it TOO much
Say you're a woman.
Alright, stop fondling your breasts and get serious.
Two guys come up to you, identical in nearly every way.
The only difference is, one seems to be living his life, while the other seems to be chasing you.
Which one are you more likely to be attracted to?
Yeah, whenever you put on your player mask, you are telling the woman you WANT HER. BAD.
You create a chase scenario - with you as the pursuer.
Don't chase
It's human nature to run when you're being chased.
What's more, there's none of that sparkling mystery involved. You want her, so she can have you whenever she feels like it. Simple as that.
Compare this to the same dude, just as cool, just as charming, but he isn't chasing you.
He's fun without forcing it, and doesn't have an ulterior motive.
He is who he is.
Not to mention, there's a good bit of intrigue.
Make her think... and WORK for your attention. Don't give it away.
'I mean,' the female you thinks, 'most guys throw themselves at me.But not this one, I wonder if he's even interested? I wonder if I can GET him interested?'
You don't have to watch a lot of teen flicks to know guys prefer the unreachable lady, and ladies reject guys who obviously worship them.
In the movies often the guys and gals end up with the one they're 'supposed' to be with and not the one who's out of reach.
That's not usually the way it REALLY works, though.
And even in the movies the unreachable bitchy hottie needs to BECOME reachable before she's rejected.
As long as she's out of reach - or thought of that way - she's more alluring.
And it works the same way with ladies.
Put on your player face, and you are COMPLETELY reachable. And where's the fun in that?
Again, saying it's good to be natural and actually ACTING naturally around hot women is a very different thing.

Derek Vitalio.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Conversations with a Babe

1i just want to say something by, anyways this is "Conversation with a Babe 1" i'd like to know what you think about it...
you'd notice i just jumped into, thats how i am, sorry...and this conversation is by instant messenger,over 2 days,due to my slow internet connections...
so here goes

For Conversation 2:
conversations with a babe 2 (zephi)

For Conversation 3:
Conversations With A Babe 3 (OK)

[13:29] 18andabove: lola...wat do u think i shd do?
[13:29] 18andabove: theres this chick really tripping for me but doent no ow to tell me...
[13:29] lola: 2
[13:29] 18andabove: and she has a 8yr old son
[13:29] lola: hw did u get 2 no dat shes trippin 4 u
[13:29] lola: is dat a problem
[13:30] 18andabove: ahn ahn...i no ...u see we used to date....b4 she became pregnant years ago...
[13:30] lola: so
[13:31] lola: cos shes after one u cant date her
[13:31] 18andabove: she shows it...
[13:31] 18andabove: yeah i how do i tell her or show her that am not interested
[13:31] lola: so if u like her
[13:32] lola: n feels shes responsible y nt
[13:32] lola: y re u nt interested
[13:32] 18andabove: maybe because i dont like her that much anymore...
[13:33] 18andabove: well not enough to want to marry her
[13:33] lola: then let her b
[13:34] 18andabove: shes the one thats interested o...not me...
[13:34] lola: tell her ure nt
[13:34] lola: show her ure nt
[13:34] 18andabove: okay and she wont feel bad
[13:35] lola: nope
[13:35] lola: jus let her understand dats all
[13:36] lola: but pls if u ve 2 give reason dont say cos she has a son
[13:36] 18andabove:wld u date someone that has a 8 yr old son?
[13:37] lola: y nt
[13:37] lola: if d woman s no more in his life
[13:37] lola: n i think he likes mi 4 real
[13:37] 18andabove: well thats u sha...but the son is there joining them together
[13:37] lola: nt only 4 mi 2 mother his chld
[13:41] lola: cant u tell a gal off
[13:41] 18andabove: ow do i do that?
[13:42] lola: show all d negative signs
[13:42] lola: or pretend u ave a gal
[13:42] lola: n talk 2 her abt her
[13:43] lola: but b careful nt 2 mix things up
[13:45] 18andabove: ok...o...thanks again...but u girls her funny o...
[13:46] 18andabove: one of u called me a small boy yesterday when i said i wanted to ask her out
[13:46] lola: lol
[13:46] lola: show her dat ure nt
[13:47] 18andabove: so how do u change that impression when thats already ow she thinks?
[13:48] lola: whenever ure wit her think high talk responsible
[13:48] lola: dnt over do it
[13:50] lola: then ull b worse than a small boy by then
[13:53] 18andabove: ok...i,ve u called someone a small boy b4? or looked at them that way?
[13:53] lola: yes
[13:53] lola: cos there a lot out there
[13:54] 18andabove: lol...i thought am only a small boy if i dont want to take responsibilty
[13:54] lola: nope
[13:55] 18andabove: so?the way the person talks and behaves abi
[13:55] lola: yes o
[13:56] 18andabove: and are there small girls too?
[13:56] lola: of course
[13:56] lola: but its better 4 a gal 2 b called 1 than a guy
[13:58] lola: lol
[14:01] 18andabove: i almost cldnt eat...because there's nothing worse...well except if she says u cant

[14:25] lola: abi
[14:29] lola: lol
[14:30] lola: i bliff u
[14:30] 18andabove: THANK U OJARE...
[14:31] 18andabove: SHE SAYS SHE'D PREFER CLUBBING...LOL
[14:31] lola: dnt blame her
[14:31] lola: u wld ave told her
[14:31] lola: cant u teach her 2 b better
[14:31] 18andabove: LOL...BOOK READING...COME ON...
[14:31] lola: u also want a ready made gal
[14:32] lola: at least help her out
[14:32] lola: when it gets unbearale then u can complain
[14:33] lola: u can make her 2 b wat u want 4m a gal
[14:33] 18andabove: COULD U CLARIFY THAT?
[14:34] lola: TEACH HER
[14:34] lola: help in buildin her
[14:34] 18andabove: U DONT MEAN THAT DO U?LOL
[14:35] lola: im serious
[14:35] lola: hw many gals will u call off
[14:36] lola: hw many ave u met nw
[14:37] 18andabove: I MEET WOMEN ALMOST EVERYDAY
[14:37] lola: so
[14:38] 18andabove: SO?
[14:38] lola: hw long will u kip lookin 4 d rite one
[14:38] lola: 4 ever
[14:38] lola: jus cos theres no rite one
[14:38] lola: simple
[14:38] lola: u make use of d one u c
[14:39] lola: when will dat come
[14:39] lola: ok i bliff u
[14:39] lola: AMEN
[14:39] 18andabove: HOPEFULLY SOON
[14:40] 18andabove: AMEN O...
[14:41] lola: churches
[14:41] 18andabove: AH...CHURCHES KE?...LOL
[14:42] lola: no b u ask question
[14:42] lola: ok

[10:34] 18andabove: so apart from watching tv, what does a girl...sorry lady like u do, when u come back from work
[10:36] lola: get my dress ready 4 d next day
[10:39] 18andabove: i thought u'd say "start getting ready for a date"
[10:39] lola: lol
[10:39] lola: na beans
[10:44] 18andabove: so lets say u were going for one, what preparations wld u make?
[10:45] lola: my hair s 2 b ready
[10:45] lola: my shoes n dress in place
[10:45] lola: n my phone well charged
[10:46] 18andabove: &?
[10:47] lola: my makeup
[10:48] 18andabove: in that order abi?
[10:49] lola: mostly
[10:57] 18andabove: wld u want to go where he likes, or where u like?
[10:57] lola: we both ave 2 put each other in2 consideration
[11:00] 18andabove: where wld ur own ideal location be?
[11:00] lola: it depends
[11:00] 18andabove: okay...
[11:01] lola: mayb d central 2 help each other out
[11:01] 18andabove: he's car,a cab,a bus or u guys
[11:02] lola: i said central so we both come on r own
[11:05] lola: talkin abt d traffic
[11:06] lola: n proximity 2 other places
[11:11] lola: IM NT A DATE PERSON

[12:06] 18andabove: okay...shey u know c?
[12:06] lola: yes
[12:06] 18andabove: shey u no where she is now?
[12:07] lola: no
[12:11] 18andabove: okay...i used to really like her then...but was really scared too
[12:11] lola: so nw u want 2 ask her out
[12:12] 18andabove: yeah if its still
[12:13] lola: its nt
[12:13] 18andabove: we often think when a ladies the way she is...they're no go areas..
[12:13] lola: cos i was told dat shes nw a contractor 4 one oil conmpany
[12:15] lola: i dn no o
[12:17] 18andabove: but really...with women is there a no go area...
[12:17] lola: one has 2 no his or her limit
[12:18] 18andabove: especially when it comes to dating women like that abi...
[12:18] lola: brb
[12:18] 18andabove: asking them out 1st wld be like eating raw pepper
[12:24] lola: thank God u no
[12:24] 18andabove: but its possible abi...
[12:24] lola: yes
[12:26] 18andabove: maybe i shd have taken my chances worst she'll say no and i'll never ask anyone out
[12:26] lola: ure on ur own
[12:28] 18andabove: lol...sha where were we b4....emm...okay so in what direction wld u want the conversation to go...when u guys are talking
[12:30] lola: we talk abt every thing dat comes 2 mind
[12:31] lola: when we start goin personal
[12:36] lola: yes n no
[12:36] 18andabove: OKAY?
[12:37] lola: ok
[12:39] 18andabove: SO WLD A KISS ON THE 1ST NIGHT BE IN ORDER?
[12:40] lola: no
[12:41] lola: u said it all movies
[12:41] lola: it doesnt
[12:45] lola: nope
[12:45] lola: ill jus b disappointed
[12:45] lola: n probably nt call him again
[12:46] lola: as in nt b interested any more
[12:50] lola: yes
[12:54] lola: neva 2 early but after dat day 2 late
[12:57] 18andabove: SO WITHIN THE NEXT 12 HRS SHEY
[13:00] lola: yes
[13:02] lola: yes
[13:02] 18andabove: EHN EHN...THATS GOOD...
[13:03] lola: yea
[13:03] lola: jus 2 b sure
[13:04] lola: if he didnt call cos of other impt reasons

[14:54] 18andabove: come to think of it...what do u look out for when a guy approaches u...
[14:55] lola: i luv tall guys
[14:55] lola: if u can come 2 mi then u re very bold
[14:55] lola: cos i no i ave dis snubish look
[14:57] 18andabove: i no u like tall if its a short person like me...u'll just give me ur best snubish
[14:57] lola: lol
[14:57] lola: nope i ve 2 look 4 d other thing i may consider a guy
[15:10] 18andabove: ok...wld u go out on a date with anyone that asks u?
[15:11] lola: nope
[15:11] 18andabove: why?
[15:13] 18andabove: sorry am getting ahead of myself...
[15:13] lola: if i dnt like u i cant like any tin u ave 2 offer
[15:14] 18andabove: the question wld be..u're looking at this tall,dark and handsome guy...speaking good english....comfortable...
[15:14] 18andabove: he asks u for a date & u say no....somethings definately
[15:15] lola: u dnt ave 2 say no
[15:16] lola: u jus dont show up
[15:16] 18andabove: ah thats just bad....y dont u just say no...he'll feel a lil bit hurt
[15:16] 18andabove: and thats it..
[15:19] lola: same reason a guy wont tell u when hes tired of u
[15:19] 18andabove: some do...well i do...
[15:38] 18andabove: like ow many guys ask u out everyday...dont exagerate o...well apart from me
[15:41] lola: it depends
[15:41] lola: at times no 1
[15:42] 18andabove: okay lets say a week...
[16:34] 18andabove: did u know that...the average single person goes on 22 dates, has 3 one-night-stands and three serious relationships before "settling down with The One."
[16:34] 18andabove: so ow do u rate...?
[16:36] lola: dnt no
[16:36] lola: cant count
[16:36] 18andabove: its a
[16:37] lola: im serious
[16:38] 18andabove: ah...its that
[16:38] 18andabove: wld u ask someone to marry u...
[16:38] lola: moi
[16:38] lola: no way
[16:39] 18andabove: that wld be too much
[16:39] 18andabove: the height of desperation
[16:39] lola: yes o
[16:40] 18andabove: whats the significance of a kiss to u...?
[16:41] lola: of course
[16:41] 18andabove: oh u told me b4...which is more intimate...the kiss or the other
[16:42] lola: kissssssssssssssssssssssss
[16:42] lola: any day any time
[16:42] 18andabove: well thats u or most women...
[16:43] lola: mi
[16:44] 18andabove: wld u say thats it for most women too...well i think thats it sha
[16:44] lola: i think so
[16:45] 18andabove: abi....
[16:46] 18andabove: so what 1st comes to ur mind when a guy invites u to his place
[16:47] lola: he wants 2 get cossy
[16:47] 18andabove: lol...
[16:48] 18andabove: and do u want too
[16:49] lola: nope
[16:49] 18andabove: but u go all the same
[16:50] lola: at times
[16:50] lola: jus 2 prove a point
[16:51] 18andabove: wat point?
[16:52] lola: its doesnt ave 2 b sex
[16:53] 18andabove: ok...thats a good one....
[16:54] 18andabove: and u dull the
[16:54] lola: abi
[16:55] 18andabove: that kain thing...
[16:55] 18andabove: but ultimately u'd want him to stimulate ur brain shey
[17:00] lola: hw
[17:00] 18andabove: as in talk...sha
[17:01] lola: yes

[10:40] 18andabove: so met anyone new recently?
[10:40] lola: yes n no
[10:41] 18andabove: ok...yes u met a new u dont want a relationship abi?
[10:42] lola: ure don dey no mi small small
[10:45] 18andabove: ehn u think u cant be more than friends?
[10:45] lola: wit d guy
[10:45] lola: or guys
[10:46] 18andabove: i mean with the guy
[10:46] lola: there two of them
[10:47] 18andabove: ok?...the 2 guys...
[10:47] lola: one d only survivin guy i met on line
[10:47] lola: but he s my age mate
[10:47] 18andabove: since when...?
[10:48] lola: then S'S friend
[10:48] 18andabove: that s's friend u were telling me abt?
[10:49] lola: yes o
[10:49] lola: ive nt even cin him
[10:49] lola: so nuttin yet
[10:49] 18andabove: whcih one wld u prefer...
[10:50] lola: d devil u no is better than d scent u jus met i cant say dat proveb applys 2 guys 2
[10:50] lola: so i dnt no
[10:50] lola: let mi tell u d plus they ave
[10:51] lola: guy1 hes tall my star mate n i no he likes mi
[10:51] 18andabove: okay?
[10:51] lola: guy2 hes a muslim he has a jpb hes quiet busy
[10:51] lola: spends time 2 talk 2 mi on phone
[10:51] lola: buy ive nt cin him
[10:51] 18andabove: ok?
[10:52] lola: he hasnt asked mi out sef
[10:52] lola: n he s a man u fan
[10:52] 18andabove: u fan?
[10:52] lola: yes o
[10:52] 18andabove: does that matter?
[10:53] 18andabove: well so what are the negatives...
[10:53] lola: guy1 hes big(very) he s always complainin
[10:54] lola: he gets angry unnecessarily
[10:54] 18andabove: okay...
[10:54] lola: guy2 he claims hes cin mi b4
[10:54] lola: so i dnt no wat ever he thinks abt mi
[10:55] lola: so nt sure
[10:55] lola: n again ve nt cin him b4 so .........................
[10:55] 18andabove: cing u is not a negative right?
[10:55] lola: mayb i may nt like him
[10:55] 18andabove: have u met the 1st guy?
[10:55] lola: he said he nos mi
[10:55] lola: but i dnt no him
[10:55] lola: so it depends on wat hes bin told
[10:56] lola: YES
[10:56] 18andabove: ok...
[10:56] lola: hes comin close was cos he said he wanted 2 no my kind of person
[10:57] lola: nt dat he was so interested in mi
[10:57] 18andabove: and?
[10:57] lola: and wat?
[10:58] 18andabove: have u done anything with guy 1...even a kiss?
[10:58] lola: nope
[10:59] 18andabove: okay...i think since its s that introduced the 2nd guy....he's safe but either really busy or shy...
[10:59] 18andabove: ow old is he?
[10:59] lola: we were 2 c ytday but cldnt make it
[10:59] lola: i dnt even no
[10:59] lola: dnt no hw 2 ask
[11:00] lola: we spoke 4 so long ytday
[11:00] 18andabove: why wldnt u go out with ur agemate
[11:00] lola: nt dat i cant but when does he intend 2 settle down
[11:01] lola: 3 yrs at least
[11:01] lola: plus my age
[11:01] 18andabove: ok i get...
[11:01] lola: then if hes no more interested by then wat happens
[11:01] 18andabove: have u seen him annoyed? how did he respond when u begged him
[11:01] lola: i told him dis 2
[11:02] 18andabove: and what did he say when u told him?
[11:02] lola: nuttin serious
[11:02] lola: he said he understands but its better i b wit some dat cares 4 mi than some1 older
[11:03] 18andabove: thats true too...
[11:03] lola: so i said he shd decide 4 mi he said i shd give him a chance
[11:04] 18andabove: how did u meet him online...where
[11:04] lola: normal chattin
[11:04] lola: dat was almost 2 yrs ago
[11:04] 18andabove: many times have u met him since then...
[11:05] 18andabove: was he interested in sex or friendship
[11:05] lola: more than 4 times
[11:05] lola: friendship
[11:05] 18andabove: ok...
[11:05] lola: but he can b raw at times
[11:05] 18andabove: yeah we're all like that ...
[11:06] lola: lol
[11:06] lola: he s my kind of person
[11:06] lola: hes tall very black nt dark n big
[11:07] lola: yes
[11:07] 18andabove: but u dont mind abi,,,
[11:07] lola: yes o
[11:07] lola: luv tall guys 2 peaces
[11:08] 18andabove: well me think u've got ur guy...
[11:08] lola: but hes skoolin n workin 2
[11:08] 18andabove: lets give guy2 a chance to prove why he deserves a damsel like u...
[11:08] 18andabove: ah...which school...
[11:08] 18andabove: lol
[11:08] lola: damsel sha
[11:08] lola: lasu
[11:09] 18andabove: how does he make money...
[11:09] lola: he works an an enginner at one of d shops at computer villiage
[11:09] 18andabove: u're portable...dont u know...u cant just go out with anybody
[11:10] lola: ive bin there thrice
[11:10] 18andabove: engineer sha...shey kon she phone lon tun she
[11:10] lola: yes sir
[11:10] lola: no
[11:10] lola: systems n all dat
[11:10] 18andabove: is it he's shop
[11:10] lola: nope
[11:10] lola: a big company
[11:11] lola: cant remember d name
[11:11] 18andabove: see as u are defending
[11:11] lola: lol
[11:11] 18andabove: all i want to know is, he wont depend on ur salary abi...
[11:11] lola: ive bin there i no wat he does
[11:11] lola: ope nt
[11:12] 18andabove: ope nt? bottom line...u'll have to give guy2 3 chances to meet u...
[11:12] lola: ok
[11:13] 18andabove: and i mean 3 chances...if he doesnt make it...he doesnt deserve u, no matter what he says...
[11:13] 18andabove: let him set up the date...u just hint him...
[11:13] lola: wat if i dnt like him
[11:13] lola: as in appearance
[11:13] 18andabove: and we'll take it from there...
[11:14] 18andabove: u havent met him yet...we''ll answer that when we meet him...
[11:14] lola: ok
[11:14] 18andabove: thats y i said meet him 3 times...kapish
[11:14] lola: he said saturday
[11:14] lola: ok
[11:14] 18andabove: ok...dont say anything abt the date till then ok?
[11:14] 18andabove: lets see if he remebers..
[11:15] lola: ok

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Have You Ever Gotten Your Heart Broken?

today, I want to talk aboutthat four-letter-word that strikes fearinto the hearts of men.
Love is one of the most powerful emotions on the planet. We all strive to experience love during our lifetime, and we really want to find a great woman who will make us feel incredible.
The desire to experience love can be so overwhelming, that often times men RUSH into it, only to be hurt later on.
A study done in the 1980s revealed that 90% of all relationships are ended by women. This means that 90% of men who've been in relationships have, at one time or another, had their hearts broken.
And when this happens, it can be a painful, gut-wrenching process. Anyone who's ever been dumped can tell you this.
Because of that, many men try and safeguard themselves by shutting down emotionally. They can still feel attraction and lust for women, but their hearts are always guarded to try and keep themselves from experiencing that hurt of being dumped again.
Women love to complain that men are never "in touch" with their feelings, and that they tend to be "emotionally distant" in relationships. But when a guy is trying to keep from getting hurt, it's pretty hard to open themselves up to their partner.
So this presents us with a problem.
Falling in love too quickly opens yourself up to the possibility of being hurt. But never allowing yourself to experience love for your
partner can sabotage your relationships.
So what's a guy to do?
The answer to this is to keep your guard up early on, and then after the relationship is established, allow yourself to open up.
If you are so scared of being hurt, that you never allow yourself to experience the joy of being in love with a great woman, you are doing
yourself a great disservice.
Guy's need to be able to allow themselves to open up to their partners.
The problem is that too many guys do this TOO EARLY.
They meet a girl they like, they begin to imagine being with her, get themselves all worked up about actually believing they are "in love" - even before they've gone on the first date!
Then, the girl gets weirded out because she is no where near as familiar with the idea of being "in love" with the guy, as he is with her, and she REJECTS him.
And then the guy gets hurt, and becomes miserable.
To avoid this situation, you have to learn the process of creating trust and comfort around women BEFORE you allow yourself to fall in
love with them.
You can like a girl as much as you want, but you must keep reminding yourself not to get too attached until she's proven she feels the
same way about you.
Keeping a girl at arm's distance early on helps you to screen her. It helps you see if she's the type of person YOU really want to be
It helps to guard your emotions so you don't get hurt. But more than that, it gives you the time needed to start forming genuine bonds and emotional connections with the girl.
Once those emotional connections begin to form and strengthen, the girl will begin to open up to you. At this point, you can allow
yourself to open up to her as well, and give yourself permission to fall in love if the girl is the one for you.
Is there a risk you might still get hurt and rejected? Sure. That risk will ALWAYS be there.
But the risk is greatly LESSENED when you ease into the situation, and actually DO THE WORK to form a strong relationship, as opposed to
rushing in already pronouncing your undying love for the woman.
Remember - the key isn't that you SHOULDN'T fall in love. It's that you shouldn't fall in love too soon!

Joseph Matthews

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

danfo toasting 101

the traffic in lagos nowadays is terrible,just forget ikorodu road.
Anyways lets blog abi,have you ever tried to toast...okay even have just a conversation with a babe in a danfo...its both hilarious and interesting.if you're the guy,you've got to be really bold and confident while if you're the chick,get ready to go pink in the cheeks.

Anyways lets use a guys experience...ok mine (am the dating/relationship lab rat abi)
boy can take three routes home,but sights a babe in the opebi bus,jumps in, regardless that its double the fare, but not before an old woman sits in the middle,ol boy no one give up.

Boy:am sure you're used to the traffic abi,directed to girl but answered by old woman.

Old woman:abi,its this brt buses,everything in lagos now is blamed on the brt buses,lol


another 5 minutes of silence,

boy tries again,notices girl is wearing 3 rings but none on engagement or wedding finger.wearing multiple rings is in vogue now,although he's not into it,but he'll make an excepion

boy: you've got 3 rings but i can still tell you're single,so you're either a rebel or its this womens liberation thing.

Old woman: taps girl,e dey talk to you

girl:sorry i didnt get that

the whole bus is silent now,everyone's listening with rapt attention.

Boy repeats question

girl:its not that am single o,i just feel comfortable wearing them.

Boy:atleast she answered abi,
i bet you have a long cool bath,recline with your legs on the stool,sipping a cold bottle of la casera watching your Your favourite soap.

Girl:smiles,you got that right

sidetalk and glances by passengers watching a thrilling episode of "the love bus"
...e see as e dey toast am
the girl fine small sha
how she wan gree now,toasting inside bus
you go don no say the boy no get money
see as dem dey pour spit on top the woman

boy:can obviously feel the pressure,starts to sweat,confidence begins to falter...goes for the closure
so could i have your number,maybe i could call you in much favourable conditions.

Girl:hesitates,really thinking about it

old woman:my daughter,abeg give am,e don try.

Girl:gives me her phone,write yours.

Boy:taps it in


boy:tells old woman thank you.

Old woman:am her mother,and you were disturbing me.

that ended well abi,but thats like 1 in 40 cases,
so quickly:lessons
the conversation should revolve around the situation
keep it short,sharp and simple
go for the number,thats all you want

shes not interested?maybe her command of the english language is

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Always buying sneakers? It's the sign of a leader

Got a passion for buying sneakers? It could be a good sign, with a poll finding that people who buy three pairs of sneakers or more a year are far more likely to be a leadership type than other people.

Mindset Media, a media company that examines personality traits of different consumers, found that people who buy more than three pairs of sneakers a year are 61 percent more likely to have the qualities of a modern leader.

These qualities were defined as having ideas and vision, and a style with others that is both inclusive and decisive.

The survey of 7,500 people, using market research group Nielsen's online panel, found multi-sneaker buyers were 50 percent more likely to be very assertive and 47 percent more likely to be spontaneous.

Lauren Arvonio, a spokeswoman for Mindset Media, said sneaker buyers were more likely to fly by the seat of their pants.

"It is often said you can tell a lot about a person by the shoes they wear, and now we have some hard data to back that up," Arvonio told Reuters.

"What is interesting is that these personality traits held true across the board, regardless of age, income, or gender."

Previous Mindset Media surveys found that people who pay their credit card bills off each month were more likely to be "highly deliberate," thinking through their actions, but also less modest than others, likely to brag about their habits.

Hybrid car owners were found to be 78 percent more likely to be highly creative than other people and less dogmatic.

so we better go get em sneakers

Friday, April 4, 2008

50 Ways to Be Romantic on the Cheap

Written by

Normally my Family Day articles are about spending time with your kids, but today we’ll talk about another important aspect of families: couples. If you’ve got a significant other, I highly recommend you keep the spark of your relationship alive and find ways to show you appreciate each other, every week and every day, if possible.

Look for little, inexpensive ways to be romantic, and it will pay off for your relationship in innumerable ways.

Why inexpensive? Well, you could rent a limo and take your love to a snooty French restaurant, or whisk him or her off to a trip to the snow-capped Alps, or rent a stadium and have the Three Tenors sing love songs for you while the New York Philharmonic plays in the background. I don’t know about you, but I can’t afford to do that kind of stuff more than a few times a month. The rest of the time, I have to resort to cheaposity.

Before we get into the list, let’s look at a few notes on how to use the list:

Weekly dates. I recommend you have a date at least once a week with your partner. It doesn’t have to be an expensive one, but at least find some way to spend a couple hours time together. If you’ve got kids, like I do, find a babysitter.
Communicate. Romantic gestures don’t take the place of real communication. Take time to talk about your goals, your dreams, your plans for the future, your current lives, things you’re happy about, things you love about the other person, things you’d like to work on, things you’re grateful for.
Inspiration. This list contains a lot of obvious stuff - you could probably come up with twice as many good ideas yourself. But the list doesn’t aim for originality - it aims to be an inspiration. Pick and choose some good ideas, or use it to spark some of your own. Sometimes we just need a little reminder.
Forget Valentines. Boycott Valentine’s Day, as it makes people think they should be romantic on special occasions. Instead, pick one of these ideas and do it any day of the week - no need for a special occasion.
OK, enough talk. Let’s look at some ways to be romantic without breaking your budget (note to my mom: don’t read this, as there are a couple of sexy-time things later on):

Write a poem.
Cook a romantic dinner.
Give a full-body massage.
Pack a sunset picnic.
Pick wildflowers on the way home.
Burn a CD with love songs.
Give dark chocolates.
Read poetry together.
Prepare strawberries with fondue chocolate.
Snuggle together on a rainy day.
Leave little love notes everywhere.
Send a love email every day.
Take a moonlit walk on the beach.
Snuggle together while watching romantic movies (Casablanca, Audrey Hepburn are my favs).
Get good wine, watch shooting stars.
Take a bath together (use bubbles!).
Bring home good coffee or a decadent sweet.
Take a walk down memory lane - visit some of the special places from your early days of dating.
Make warm chocolate cake for dessert.
Make a scrapbook with photos, mementos, and little notes from you lives together.
Kiss in the rain.
Ride a ferris wheel.
Sneak away from a party and make out.
Bring home great take-out, and light some candles.
Fix something or fix up the house just to make your partner happy.
Slow dance to romantic music.
Take a nap together.
Kiss slowly, touching his or her back and neck and nape - slowly.
Make a list of everything you love about him or her.
Write a love letter.
Clip or email things that make you think of him or her, every day.
Go to a movie, ignore the movie, and make out like teen-agers.
Groom yourself, and try to look good for your partner.
Take some quiet time and talk about your day.
Write little notes, one for each way he or she drives you crazy.
Feed each other grapes.
Recreate your partner’s favorite romantic movie scene.
Pretend you’re going on a first date - show up at the door with flowers, all dressed up, with your car washed and cleaned, looking spiffy. Recreate the first time.
Create a little box with a bunch of your partner’s favorite things inside.
Paint each other with flavored body paint. Be creative!
Try some sexy role-playing. Get dressed up, be daring, have fun.
Give a little token to your partner to wear, and say it’s to remind him or her all day that you love them.
Sing a favorite song to him or her. Only do this if you can sing fairly well.
Have dinner on the roof, with some candles. This doesn’t work if your roof slopes sharply.
Hold hands, and walk somewhere with lots of pretty lights.
Say I love you. In a different way, every day.
Blindfold your partner. Use a feather. Slowly.
Declare your love, very publicly.
Fruit or berries and freshly made whipped cream.
Play Sade. Do what comes naturally. Slowly.

Thursday, April 3, 2008

wednesday 02/04/2008 (love dont love me no more)

got to work early today...yeah there was a fleet of brt buses at the busstop...which was so nice and so few people...i still have a deadline to meet and all my bosses are around me...directly at my back which i hate,it even gets me to do more errors...l comes online and really chat about relationships as usual, maybe if she agrees,i'll post them least the candid opinion of women...thats a nice idea o...get a few more babes or guys...or chats with experts...sha am still trying to get more stuff for my blog...and the service...atleast we're making of us is suppossed to advertise with a softsell...hold on, i have to talk to her...she hasnt still met the advert guy...thats not nice...rush home today, i cant dare miss the matches todayman u didnt disappoint their fans yesterday and i hope my beloved chelsea would make me happy today...and ps...anyone that says christiano ronaldo shouldnt be the european and world footballer of the year, shd have their head examined...i just pray he has a good spell at the european nations cup...

I need a man thats handsome,caring and down to earth.I need a lady thats sociable,motherly and intelligient.Yada yada yadaaren't we all tired of hearing and using this lines.all you need really is attention...loser.and Yes,you heard me right or read me right...lolin my world,need means desperation and also connotes some form of,remember when you were a kid,some of us still her,thats for another time,you tell dad i need 20 naira to buy biscuit,if you came from my home,using the word need,means i won't get it,and if by some powers i do get my way,its by getting been scrutinised.So why not replace the word need with am.simple.just tell me and also show what you bring to the table.Instead of needing all this qualities in someone,why don't you build this qualities in your self,your networth would increase triple fold.One of my other theories states that you should imagine yourself as a company being traded on the stock exchange and your networth appreciates and depreciates according t market forces,in this case,factors that affect our you are seen by the opposite would you want to be a stock like total or those in the tier b.The more you market yourself,the more confident you are in your abilities and the more you standout.just listen to the lyrics of any rap artist. So in short,try and market your qualities,you'll get a great market for brand you.

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

SUNDAY 30*03*08