Thursday, December 17, 2009

2012 and then he'll be four


13 days till the end of 2009 and i'm already thinking of can't blame me really, i just
saw the movie 2012. I figure i need atleast a billion euros to ensure the existence of my surname... the ticket's for my mrs by the
(Now you've got to see the movie to "get" me)

Among other thing's i've started making plans for the coming years...think the japanese...who have 100 year limited mine to 3 years...till 2012.

In the past few days i've read so many books,
Anthony Robbins - Awaken the Giant Within
Rhonda Byrne - The Secret
Seth Godin - 99 Cows
Gary Vaynerchuk - Crush It!
Ben Casnocha - My Start-Up Life

Really Outstanding books, that i would recommend for anyone in a rut.

I get into that mode almost every december... That's when you're suppossed to take stock shey... its usually like i haven't just done enough. So my quest for ideas begin, hence i soak in information from all media, then i distill it, then i drink it up, i get "high" and finally i start again.

Yes, i got the mobile dating service going's starting off slowly,like a text or 2 a day, unlike at inception in 2007 when i got 20 to 30 texts per day.come on people.
That's the thing. when you start, be ready to go all the way, because a lull/pause in activity allows people to tune off and focus on the next best thing.

how many of you folks agree that when a man loves a woman there's no extent to which he couldnt go to make her comfortable? Like he could even do money rituals just to keep her.Most of the yoruba movies i watch nowadays seem to have that same theme.At the end of the day,the wife finds out, doesnt consent to it, the guy dies & then the lady continues to spend the money.why not kuku leave the money.

Omo, Ikira to all the mothers out there, una too gbasky... its really hard work taking care of children, especially 6 month olds... whew...yeah i'm on my leave and my sister came to drop her son with me... everything's all rosy till he starts crying...then i just get confused,
if i wasn't strong, i would cry don't just know why he's try to give him food, doesn't work.then you start patting him,with the hope that he'll sleep, no chance...
you let him cry and pretend he's not there, the neighbours come to check whats wrong
thankfully mumsie's around she handles it.
Hmmm,he's crying again...i'll be back in a bit i hope..."sigh"

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

"Beauty" in a Bird's Eye

Hmmm… A list of theparakeet‘s Favourites.

My Foundation: None

My Mascara: Loreal Telescopic
My Blush: None

My Eye Shadow: Sleek
My Day Cream: Nitrogena Day cream SPF 15
My Lipstick: None (Use Victoria Secret Lip Gloss instead)
My Beauty Product Brand: I do various brands

My Essential Beauty Product: Sleek crème to oil pressed powder

My Favorite Makeup Product: Sleek crème to oil pressed powder

My Perfumes: Cerrutti Image, Angel Demon by Givenchy, Cool Water, Pink by Lacoste, Space NK

My Nails: I usually don’t wear nail polish

My Feet: Same as nails

My Hands: Varies from Vaseline to Dove to Nivea hand cream and in the past Avon

Three Products to bring on a deserted island: Black eye pencil, lip gloss and pressed powder

Woman I admire for their beauty: None

Woman with the Best Sense of Style: None

How Do I Define Womanhood: Strength and Dignity

My Favorite Fashion Publication: I don’t read any.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

He/She who has ear's let as they like

Hi, Everyone!!! Hope you had a marvelous week...Good...
I've been scared emotionally lately and based on what i know now, i'm going to make a couple of sweeping generalizations (wunmi can stop reading now lol).

A girl will never forget her first guy...
A guy won't too because she was the one that gave us our first BJ, and now you have to do it too.

Ever loved someone who didnt think the world of you... me too.

What's worse? having feelings for someone who's married or someone who's gay?

Guys don't really want to get married. We'd rather have you as a live in girlfriend.

Women are as insecure as men...and more confused...
my last babe thought i was Insensitive,while my new babe think's i'm too insecure,
ladies & gentlemen, i have not fu cking

Girl's would really like to call our phones till our batteries ran out but...then we'd think they were psycho's shey

Okay, so if we really liked you...even it meant stealing a phone, we'd call you.

If he's married and you're dating him, he'll only leave his wife for you...IN YOUR DREAMS.

There's always going to be that girl that think's we're cute ...(fu ck us fo r free) even though we're dating you.

A woman will dump you if she's getting bored in the relationship...thats the reason why men cheat too ( well, one of the reasons).

If a lady has all your qualities, does all you do ...then goes 1% more...then consider yourself getting dumped soon ....

If you've been dating for atleast 2 years and he's never popped the question, then he's never gonna do it.

In fact, if you dont get married soon, you're gonna get dumped.

Most times, we make you think you dumped us,really...Ever heard?
-I don't want to stand in your way or hold you back.
-I don't deserve you.
-I'm so jealous of the guy who gets to marry you.
-hmmm...wo, you can add more" those are the one's have used.

If we call you out of the blues, it means we want to get fu really know that don't you?

If a friend (girl) treats you as a friend,she will not sleep with you,get your head out of the clouds, mate.If she did it once (out of sympathy),no she's not your babe, because she won't do it again.

There are really guys out there that won't doubledate.

If you cheat on your babe and you're upfront about it...yes *i'm not crazy*, there's actually a possibilty that you'll be forgiven.


If a guy wants to date you ehn, he'll ask you out.

We really do need to have sex!

You can check our phones all you want, Read all our messages but we'll only get caught if we want to.

Hmmm....all girls are up for some naughty fun.

Ever f ucked a girl while thinking of someonelse....well she does too.

We do CRY when we get DUMPED.

There are three kinds of ladies out there...
Those we're not just attracted/interested in (it's not your fault, it's just us)
Those we're attracted to,but we really just want sex
Those we wanna get married to

When you meet a guy, you instinctively know if there's hope or not.

If a guy makes you cry (well apart from tears of ecstacy), dump him now.

Yep I'm done now....*deep breaths*
Hope you enjoy the songs on my this space on my mobile/audio dating.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

I Don Come Again

Hmmm its been a while o....Aaahhh close to 4months since i last showed up here...
so what excuse i'm i gonna give you guys...hmmm....wo, none ojare
in short i just got bored, and i had to deal with business....
i have even thought of closing this blog a couple of times, but i just eventually decided to leave it...
this serves as my online presence and yes a couple of people actually made i'm definately keeping this one...

Okay, i'm gonna try and give you recaps on all thats happened...well all thats affected me in the last couple of months:

Yeah, i'm still in the business of making people beautiful...nowadays i only attend to ladies who call you get to be treated like a queen that you are...

I'm birthday mates with the best country on the planet, even though we had a lack lustre celebration here, waiting for the big 5.0. celebrations next year.

I celebrated my birthday on the 21st of October, and as usual i kept to myself (which wasnt funny, i've got a steady babe now)...i used the day to reflect on my journey in life...

Ever tried to live without social media (twitter,Almighty facebook,myspace etc)....well i did, for a whole month...the silence was worth it i tell should try it sometimes...

I've also contemplated restarting my mobile dating service...yes, i got a lot of calls and text messages to continue with it.Hopefully that'll be with a twist sha...Ever heard of "audio dating"...its going to be a lot of fun.

And The Man Died!!!
Micheal Jackson died and some would say he was as popular dead as alive.
Gani Fawehinmi died, The only true Crusader i know goes to where the Old ones go.

Reforms (Sanusi) hit the Banking sector; GTBank is safe *heaving a sigh of relief*

Boko Haraam think people first thought it was another religious war.

A couple of music awards held...Both within and outside Nigeria.
2009 SMVA's , why didnt they screen it!!!...shey because the first one had hiccups? Kel won an award sha...Thats about it.

Weird Stuff at the MAMAs...all i can remember is Akon & Wyclef in their

The Emmys Held and some lady (Victoria Rowell) wore leftover "Obama" Ankara.
Enough Reality TV Shows....Centage Superstars, Koko Manshion

Comedy Shows....AY Live, Basket Mouth Uncensored

Some musicians dropped (or about to drop) albums, those i'm feeling....Omawunmi,9ice,Inyanya, Diamondz,P Square,Jim Iyke???, Lara George

Nigerian Artistes go on Hunger Strike...well some of them ...hehehe

Someone finally won 10 million naira on who wants to be a millionaire.

Whitney Houston Relaunches Career...

Jay Z dropped BluePrint3...

The (TuFace vs R Kelly i dont know him but he did a song with me Wahala).

Darey's "Let You Know" video hits our TV screen...Mediocre Song, Cool Video

And Serena Does the Photoshoot...

Rihanna goes Gaga....I love Lady Gaga by the way (shes a breath of fresh air)

and Solange Knowles shaves it all off...Me Like

The VMA'S hmm....Lil Mama, Beyonce, Taylor Swift and This....

The BET Award 2009...Wack as usual

Rita Dominic becomes new face of Nokia Africa... Thought we'd have her pictures on every new nokia phone "hiss"

Kunle Afolayan's The Figurine... Nice Movie

Virgin Nigeria ceased to exist, changed to Nigeria Eagles Airlines...duhh...What ever happened to just "Nigeria Airways"?

Ghana won the Under 21 Football Championship held in Egypt.They became the first African country to do so.The Nigerian Team just tried biko.

Jenson Button wins Formula1 Season with a race to go

Caster Semenya: male or female? hmmm...both

US Secretary of State Visits Nigeria...She really made sense...

They've been so much hoopla about white models who are made to darken their skin for photoshoots... abeg abeg abeg...i think this racism issue gets overblown sometimes... anyone seen "White Chicks" by "The Wayne Brothers". Abi.

There's also the thing about the nation's image been battered viz a viz "District 9" and "The Sony Advert". Nice one that Sony Apologised, i wouldnt wait for the Producers of "District 9" though... Better we make a "District 1" in reply.

Which brings me to "beef" not that kain..he he...meant "beef" between musicians....In the Red Corner Representing Chocolate City we have the Undisputed king of Nigerian Rap "MI" and in the Blue Corner we have...."Iceberg Slim"...dont know much about the dude...go ahead "google".

The major beef...i'm liking now is that between "Nicky Minaj" and "Lola "Angel" Monroe"... Nothing as captivating as a cat fight.

Guinness marks 250 years...if you have to drink, drink short brown bottles & i dont mean maltina.

Veda Laptops...Nice

Chimamanda Adichie's "The Thing Around Your Neck"...wish the stories were longer

And yes we muslims fasted...And your boy went all spiritual....I should do that often sef.

Finally was able to visit "The Icecream Factory"...if you're single, better start visting the place... enough babes o... plus the icecream's really good.

Thats it for now...Expect more later...I said i'm back shey

Monday, June 29, 2009

Relationship and Business

Been awhile everyone...hope you guys are all right

Business, business can often be comparable to a relationship.A few friends know i started my cosmetics business about 6 months ago, the same time i got the green light for a relationship with the mrs.

Both have gone through one major stage now and moving towards an essential stage.They have both passed what i call the "castle in the air" stage. For want of not been too dramatic yeah.When i started both ventures/adventures, i couldnt think of any other thing. it was either the business or mrs boss.

I had grandiose plans of world domination, my cosmetics business was the best thing since sliced bread. Mrs boss was just perfect and i had to marry her yesterday.She couldnt put a foot wrong.Then i would have smelt her armpits all she just needed to do was ask.Not that i wouldnt do it now...hmmm...anyway sha.hope youguys get the gist.

We sent messages everyday, i called her like crazy, couldnt wait to be with her.she always wanted to hang around me.she was hit by the "kehinde" bug.Everyone wanted to meet me to know what the "f$%k" it was all about.Trust i didnt disappoint.My Friends just wouldnt stop teasing me, i was tied to mrs boss strings.My relationship with the bois suffered, we couldnt go to trhe club together no more,we couldnt stare at chicks together no more...miss them it really didnt matter cause, it was all for mrs boss.

Business couldnt be better either,you know, when you start a new venture, well me,my family & friends are soo supportive,everyone fighting over themselves to be the first to buy or use the service. they recommend you to everyone. you get big contracts and money keeps rolling're leaving the are attracted to praise & reject criticism which could be good advice.You & your business are indestructible.


I noticed that overtime, the initial gragra started to wear off, the calls reduced,the messages started trickling,i didnt get "high" on her bodily fumes anymore.She cried (i hate tears), she vomits when sick (yuck). she loves high heels but still complains about her feet at every outing, I couldnt touch her everytime,
We couldnt have sex (shes religious)...i mean too religious.She "leaked"....I realised i raised my voice when she irritates me,i am lackadisical about my dressing,i didnt open the door for her everytime, i made fun of her alot,i was getting to possesive & jealous,and i didnt take her to the movies anymore.anyways you get the point.

I realised she was human.

Then i have to try and understand this human,who i wanted to prolly marry.could i cope with her wants and whims,her tears and cramps.I had to be realistic about us now.

Business slowed down,I had practically sold to everyone i knew...selling to those who didnt need it sef.Now i knew there were other brands in the market and its a dog eat dog world out there.I had to hustle more to get the least amount of sales.Selling makeup alone,couldntpossibly take me to uhuru could it.

I think the best thing about the "been realistic" stage are the questions and been know, you're not bullshitting yourself anymore.Noone needs to talk to you because inside of knowthe know that for the relationship to work, you need communication, talking about your goals and aligning it together for your future and acting. you know that to make more sales you have to be really
creative and hustle more.

I really dont know whats after this stage, and i sincerely hope its bliss.All i know is that its the "been realistic" stage, that makes or mars a relationship or a business.I think i'm dealing with both amazing well...well,better than i expected.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Live your best life everyday

hello everyone....its been a while i've been here...and i've missed blogville,i still go bloghopping though and mighty me they're a lot of new bloggers on naija blogvilla now o,nice to see that...not that i'm so old

whew...i was practically forced back here by stuff that happened over the weekend..yelz. someone i know somehow thru a blogger died...and it just hit me the guy was just about 4 years older...and my world literally stopped.i wasnt acheiving all i set out to do (blogging inclusive) in the short span that God has gifted me with so i had to be back here....

Was feeling all romantic on thursday and sent roses to mrs boss at work,she and her numerous friends & colleagues appreciated it and i got a lil sumthing sumthing in return from mrs and she met mumsie for the 1st time on saturday,i was nervous all cause its like i just apparently sealed my movement from being single with the enough faaji to being HOOKED

Strolling hand in hand with mrs boss yesterday, i asked what she wanted from me this week and she's like "i want you to make more money".& i'm like yeah, what else, she said "thats all i want" and here i am begging you folks *prostrating-like its my traditional engagement*begging please buy my makeup

Business has been moving Insha Allah, I got a number of calls from nigerian bloggers who made requests and i am so humbled.and all my onigbese's have paid so things are really looking up.Like you all know by now, I deal in Tara,Bobbi Brown,Sleek,Black Opal cosmetics...thinking of adding lise too...
Well yelz ladies and (gentlemen-a la zac efron stlye)...i'll give you discounts.For now, i'm out....Live your best life everyday shey una hear.

FYI,Max Factor yelz, the make-up brand's gonna be disappearing from the market next better stock up o

Thursday, April 16, 2009

eyeshadow & scoopsnija....Finally

How's it been Ladies and Gentlemen,
Its been a while be lying if i said it was just business
I really have been bored, wanting to do the next exciting thing,planning a trip

Yes, has been moving beautifully....i know, i know...still have those my customers that havent paid sha(ssshhh...dont tell them but what can i do but be thankful that they even bought from me anyways.

Anyone know where i can get Iman eyeshadow?...its only the powder thats so popular over here...Omo, I didnt know there were so many brands of eyeshadow o, until i went to the market to stock up.whew, so many to pick from...but for now, i've still stuck to Sleek,Tara,Bobbi Brown.So holla if u wanna.

Ehn Ehn,I 'm Having a makeup marketing seminar this weekend so i'll keep you posted, and yes finally i've decided to learn how to make ladies up.can i specialize on doing only their eyes and lips...prolly not....but dont you just love a well done lips and eyeshadow's that colourful.

By the way visit for the latest entertainment gist.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Makeup Contracts

Been a while o abi....
No be my fault na, i dey try sell ni....
Selling's the most easy thing in the world, its also the most difficult activity too
Anyhoo, i'm making headway, yeah...
I got a contract...ehn now, a contract to "supply" my twin's colleagues at work, and she works in a bank, so enough

Yes o, the increased disparity between the dollar and the naira affected me too.Thank God i thought to diversify.

A few changes will be coming to this blog....I'm going to be adding more Makeup tips courtesy (Coup de Coeur) , and (Naijagal).
Hopefully i'll get to add a few makeup videos and Pictures.
I wouldnt mind contributions from my esteemed readers too o...shey una know say i be guy.closest i ever got to using makeup is painting my toe nails black....Do you think there's something wrong with that?...please tell me.

Hmmm let me see, okay ehn ehn, please tell me what you think about this transition from a relationship blog to a selling makeup

And if you get "contract" for me, abeg holla

Friday, March 6, 2009

Makeup On Point....Check

Ladies and Gentlemen, Hope you're having a great day...well you ought to "write your own script"...a certain bank seems to have the lockdown on creative phrases....okay its Bankphb,please patronise them sister works there

Ehn ehn, this is one of those posts that you have to quickly write down all you have to say before you forget please forgive me if its disjointed.and yes, i will join issues cause i dont want to write two posts.

Do you have those days that you just think about your job and you cant take it anymore? well i had one yesterday and i decided i was quitting.Yeah,I'm quitting my day job...and thats it...although its gonna take a bit of time....i have a schedule planned already.I just hope i stick to it.I have a lot of projects i would want to be involved in...might gist una later.

Business is really moving o and i actually need to pump in more in demand far overshadows supply.Luckily i've got family that can "risk" their hard earned money for me.

On this second batch of merchandise i bought, I got a diary, wrote all the items and the cost, but i didnt write my expected profit, dont count your chicks before they are hatched abi.So i have an agreement with my major client for now that i would be coming over every friday to restock or collect money...instead of hapharzadly like before.hopefully that will ensure that gbogbo owo ma pe (All the money will be complete).

By the way, would you beleive that the company actually increased the price of the products, Now i know how it feels when government increases the price of a shame that its my customers thats going to recieve the backlash.although i'll try to subsidize when i can.i'm becoming an economist abi using all this big big words.

And the thing about Iman is confirmed,she isnt bankrupt but her major distributor is,so for now you got to hurry before my Iman Cosmetics Stock gets soldout.

And i have mumsie to thank for all the advice, she's really got my back on this one.

Ladies,Now pause on reading a lil bit,take out your mirror and look into it....Is Your Makeup On Point? No smugs? No Blurs?....Now Clap for dont know o, i think i'm in love with make up and especially when ladies are creative with eye shadow (like the one above), easy on the red lipstick though.

By the way, i twit too....almost every minute...forgive me....i feel its more easier getting my thoughts across could drop ur twitter ID so i can follow u...well without pestering to buy my products

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Didnt Think Selling Makeup Was This Easy

Ladies and Gentlemen, its your boi...trying to make a living selling makeup

Okay so dont let your caption deceive, i'm really trying to console
like anyone (thats your friend) will tell you, being a startup is not easy.
you have a thousand and one details to take care of,then you also need to keep your customer happy.

Really business is moving, i think, just that, Women,Women, kai...they want to negotiate to the barest minimum and on top everything they'll want to pay
just imagine
You tell her the product is 1,500 yeah?, she beats it down to 950 then wants to pay even when she pays...she'll pay 900 and with a smily face tells you you cant leave 50 for her.
and shey you know i like fine fine
I love my customers.

And una fit bad, They'll be like this one is not good, its mary kay i use...even when they know mary kay isnt designed for the african the end of the day, they now want to use that reason to shortchange...
emi okin gba sha (i dont accept sha)

Anyhoo,i'm at the teething stage right, so i cant give up
besides,i've had lots of people who do cash and carry,so i cant complain too much

A very important lesson when you're selling not touch your profit,till you sell all your stock...better still reinvest your profit into the business.

By the way, i stock Sleek cosmetics now o...

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Tara's Orekelewa to the Rescue

Whew....How was your val?...hope u had an exciting day with ur loved one.
I spent mine calling makeup distributors
didnt know Iman cosmetics was this scarce in lagos....abi people dey hoard am
Sha i havent found one but i found ample replacement for my client
yep Tara's Orekelewa to the rescue,
I finally became a beauty rep yesterday
I registered and paid my i officially stock her cosmetic line now
and i think they're wonderful

Okay, so i got home with my products and sample, and sweet mum, even though she keeps saying its a woman's line of business, was the 1st to she mi lo wo (buy from me)....that in itsef is a blessing i believe.

Then a few of my sister's friends also bought although they've not paid o.

And today i had the balls to face my female colleagues at work, one bought too, with the others needing more i'm off to a great start abi

Ladies and Gentlemen, i'll keep you posted on subsequent marketing,sales and drama on the adventures of this guy selling

Ehn ehn, i found out that women buy makeup alot even during if u want additional income why not start selling....i dont mind the competition...well unless u're on my

Wo...i'm off looking for an Iman Distributor, Know anyone in Lagos?...pls i'm on bended knees, tell me o

(I'm sorry if i didnt respond to your match making messages, the service is on hold for now)

Ladies...pls if you'd buy a simple makeup kit, what wld u want to be in it?

Friday, February 6, 2009

Ready for business

Ladies and Gentlemen, bois and girlz...not again you might
well i'm back and ready for business...another one you might

yeah its the makeup business ladies and a few meterosexual guys....whatever that is

I love beautiful women and if you read the last post i'm sure you know the major reason why i'm going into this business...and its not about the global recession o.

Thank you for supporting me ehn, and i cross my heart not to disappoint you.* i'm in deep s**t* and thanks so much for your tips at being good at this.
I hope you'll be able to endure all my own beauty tips'll prolly be more of avant garde makeup stay tuned

A few people didnt even know about my mobile dating serivce, well i still run one...i just stopped it been for free for now.till i get open source code or i get my shortcode...i'm sorry if i just burst your valentine's day bubble (hopes of getting a guy or babe before then)

Hopefully and please pray with me that i get it back on track before the end of the year.

Okay,so tomorrow...i'm gonna get my first stock of Tara's Orekelewa...
I'm ecstatic...its a new experience for me and i hope i enjoy it.

(P.S, I was at the toni kan bookreading in case you're wondering...recognised a few bloggers too)

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

SWIISM- So What If I Sell Makeup

Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and guys...i'm back this year 009
What happens in 2008 stays in 2008 fellas, so i wont bore you
I made it to a Thousand people using the mobile dating service so i'm upgrading *Stay Tuned*
hope you like the change in template...

my new catchphrase now is SWIISM...yes o
okay i do sell makeup, and i'm a guy plus i'm not gay (so u know)
whats the big deal really...
okay i understand its what women are suppossed to do,
but whats that funny look i see in ur
I love beautiful women as you'll prolly know,
now i want to make them look more appealing to the eye.

I would want to know though...Ladies why would you want to buy makeup from me?
I stock all brands by the way, hope that isnt too much?
I have so many questions...hope you guys help me with the 1st two...
and wish me luck