Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Why Does It Work For Everyone Else But You?

Sometimes people think that my tactics work for
everyone else BUT them.

Like they are some "special case" cursed with

But the truth is, they aren't! If you're not
getting results, it's because you're doing something

Take this story for example...



I was reading your email, and I am interested
in your book. My question to you is, first of
all, how BIG is the book (how many pages) ?

Secondly, I just wanted to say that I've been
reading dating ebooks from other people's products
for years now, and I actually STILL don't have
any success.

And to top it off, I think of myself as a catch...
so I don't understand why I can't meet women Or
worst off, why it SEEMS like the techniques,
"work for everybody else, but they just don't
work for me."

This makes me feel like there's no hope and
purpose to even read.

My third question is this: I live in Manhattan,
NYC and I am trying to learn how to meet women
on the streets because I see TONS and TONS of
attractive and available women on the streets
all the time....

But the problem is that they're always WALKING,

I don't know how to go about ANYTHING with these
women. It's almost like you have to chase them
if you wanna talk to them....

Another obstacle that I find is that, I don't
want to scare them. I figure a strange man
walking up to her on the street will scare her,
and scaring her,,,, scares ME.... will you're
product get me to a point where I can do this??

I really wanna become the guy that literally has
TONS and TONS of hot women all over him, and I'm
really willing to do WHATEVER it takes to do it...
but I just can't get it to WORK... Literally....

I keep running into a wall somewhere... I'm not
the type of guy who goes to bars, and I really
don't know where else to go to meet women, EXCEPT
on the STREETS. When I say on the streets I mean
in public, like walking down the street, sitting
on a park bench, standing in front of a store
smoking a cigarette, etc....

I am actively trying to get this handled... not like
these guys who just read stuff and then sit around
and not do anything. I actually made a committment
to myself to go outside, EVERYDAY, and walk the
streets talking to women. I brought a tiny journal
so I can journal my experieces and results, so I
have the GUTS to do pretty much ANYTHING, but like
I said, I keep running into a bunch of, "NOs."

For example, I walked up to about 25 women over a
period of days, and documented what happened, and
I more or less asked most of them if they were
single and ALL of them virtually said, NO they
aren't, and kept moving.... then I asked a few
women who were random strangers, "Do you wanna have
sex??" And pretty much got a few no's also. That's
what I mean, when I say my efforts seem to be
getting me nowhere... I stuck with it for about 2
maybe 3 weeks, then I pretty much just stopped.
That was about 2 and a 1/2 months ago.

Amin, NYC, 25.

MY RESPONSE:>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Oh, dear, dear Amin... you're doing some things
right, but other things very, very WRONG.

And you don't even have my book! No wonder you're
frustrated. :-(

Okay, let's begin with the good stuff...

First of all, I want to commend you on having the
commitment to make this work, and actually go out
and meet women.

THAT is one of the hardest things to do - actually
get off your butt and start talking to girls!

If you can do that, you're halfway to where you need
to be.

You also seem to have some self-esteem going. You
feel you're a catch, which is good. Guys who don't
feel worthy of women have a hard time getting them.

You are also making time to get out of the house
and meet people. This is great! You realize that
you can't meet women sitting in a dark corner of
your room, so you're doing something to change that.

All of these are good things.

Now, onto the BAD stuff...

First of all - meeting women on the street is a
tough way to start out.

Having been to New York many times, I realize that
there are gobs and gobs of amazing women on the
streets, since New Yorkers tend to WALK a lot.

But as you're finding out, it is very hard to
approach women on the streets!

Unless you get them at a crosswalk or someplace
where they've stopped briefly, it is hard to
approach them.

Seriously - the best way I've found to do street
approaches is to actually FOLLOW the woman to where
she's going, and then approach her once she's there.

But this can really take you out of your way,
and some guys feel like a "stalker" doing it.

What you have to realize is that it's best to go
somewhere to meet women that makes things easy
on you.

Instead of prowling the streets, go someplace you
enjoy going - a coffee shop, a book store, a theater,
Manhattan has a billion of these places.

Go to Times Square at lunch time. Go to the Park.
Go places where women HANG OUT instead of WALK.

This makes approaching way easier.

Also - make meeting women part of your life. So
when you're going to the grocery store, or dropping
off your dry cleaning - or WHATEVER - if you see an
opportunity with a woman, you go for it!

So that's about where you meet women, let's talk
about the HOW.

Seriously - I don't know what "dating books" you've
been reading, but if you're going up to girls and

"Are you single?"


"Do you want to have sex?"

Right off the bat, it's no wonder you are meeting
with frustration.

Neither of these are good ways to approach women!

Bad, bad Amin!

When you approach a woman, you don't want to come
off TOO sexual. Asking her if she's single or
if she wants to boink you before any trust or
comfort is built up on her part is a very bad

Instead, you want to start off light, and engage
her in a conversation that allows her to experience
feelings of trust and comfort with you.

The more comfortable she is talking to you, the
more willing she'll be to give you her number or
go out on a date.

Remember: especially in a city like New York, 90%
of your beginning game is convincing girls you're
a nice, normal guy and not a weirdo loser.

So if you approach women the way I tell you to in
my book, you BYPASS the rejection phase by engaging
them in nice, normal conversation.

Then, during that conversation, you create emotional
connections that lead to you asking for (and getting)
the date.

Remember - approaching women won't SCARE them unless
you're being scary. Coming off too strong or saying
the wrong things will creep any woman out.

But if you approach them the RIGHT WAY, they will not
only be fine with it, they will actually WELCOME
you talking to them - because women love it when
they meet great guys and not creeps!

Joseph Matthews


  1. thanks for visiting my blog. I would have loved to comment but i'm kinda engaged. lol...

    Anyways make sure you are the best at what you do and i'm sure to see you at the top!

  2. hey tankojjetty,
    I stumbled onto your blog accidentally and as I was reading the posts, I found that you're Muslim! So I thought I should share a few words with my brother in Islam.
    Please do not be offended by what I'm about to say; it's just some well-meant words from a sister to her brother in Islam. The Prophet (SAW) told us that religion is naseeha (giving dood advise) so I believe it is the duty of Muslims to advise and help each other as the case requires.
    I would hate for every muslim what I hate for myself.
    From what I read, I inferred that you are cautious about falling into sin and must, therefore, assume that you are not aware of the rules about interacting with the opposite gender. Allow me to summarise a few of them.
    You do know, I hope, that fornication/adultery (zina) are very grave sins in Islam. And, as God-conscious as you are, I'm certain you would not forget the presence of Allah and the fact that every single thing we do is being recorded by angels.

    I am not accusing you of commiting zina; I'm just asking you to consider whether the person who facilitates zina is free of blame. Would an accessory to murder be excused and not punished by the court of law? No, my brother.
    If that is so, what about creating a blog which makes it easier for people to comit zina? On this blog are tips on getting women, a means of contacting other singles, tales of encounters, etc.
    Does that discourage sin? keep in mind that, in Islam, whoever encourages others to perform a good deed would get the reward of doing that deed whenever they perform it. Same with the evil deed. Encourage someone to do bad deeds, and whenever they commit it, you get the sin too!

    Isn't that awful? We all have enough sins already without having the sins of others (whom we encouraged) piled up on us!

    May Allah protect us and guide us to what is right. And while I'm on the topic, I would like to remind you, my dear brother, that not only is zina prohibited but ANYTHING that leads to zina is also prohibited.
    Allah says in the Qur'an:"Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things) and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allah is All-Aware of what they do." [Surah 24. Nur: verse 30]

    So men are not supposed to be staring at un-related women. The Prophet (SAW) said looking is the arrow of shaytan so the first glance is permitted but the second is counted against you. Look at that! Even STARING at unrelated women is forbidden talkless of touching them. Even talking un-necessarily is disliked because it may lead to more intimate converstions. Chatting about your life on msn is one-step away from a potential relationship.

    My dear brother, I speak not to disparage you or any such thing; I write this out of my concern and love for my brothers and sisters. I would love for someone to correct me when I'm wrong so at least I'll be able to do the right thing.

    May Allah guide us all.
    Fee amanillah.
    A concerned sister.