Conversations With A Babe 3 (OK)

Yeah i had to get this into this month...my third in the series...Conversations with a babe...
This conversation is with a female blogger, cant tell you who she is, cause her identity had been COMPROMISED awhile ago...anyways enjoy this

For Conversation 1:
Conversations with a Babe

For Conversation 2:
conversations with a babe 2 (zephi)

18andabove: am back...sorry abt that...
18andabove: am sure u're tired of hearing me say sorry..lol
18andabove: cld we continue?
OK: lol
OK: not quite
OK: my PC played up too
18andabove: dont like using the word so much...it reduces its significance
18andabove: like love...i think we use both words too much...witrhout meaning it
OK: i guess
OK: dont they say love makes the world go round?
18andabove: yeah right...lol
18andabove: do u know the opposite of love?
OK: I know its not necessarily hate
OK: but really I dont know
18andabove: its indifference...
18andabove: have u ever been in love?
OK: yes
18andabove: ow does it feel?
OK: great when all is going well
OK: but pain cant qualify what you feel when it goes wrong
18andabove: have u ever loved someone who didnt love u back?
OK: Hmm
OK: am not sure
OK: cant remember now
OK: no
OK: I actually haven't
OK: I've been infatuated with someone who didnt feel the same
18andabove: and ow did that make u feel
OK: ah...problem is I always get my way
OK: I had sex with him and got him out of my system
OK: I learnt a lot from that brief encounter
OK: so now when I feel a strong attraction for a guy
OK: I wait it out to make sure its the real thing
OK: its so easy to think infatuation is love
OK: once I had sex with him he was just another bloke I didnt give a toss about
OK: so at the end of the day I was not hurt
18andabove: yeah i guess so...
18andabove: and got it out of ur system...that easily?
OK: yup
OK: I was shocked too
OK: may be cos the sex was bad
18andabove: well, maybe u just wanted sex with the bloke?
18andabove: get out of here
18andabove: ow can u determine that by the way?
OK: Its hard
OK: I dont ever see a guy and feel i wanna have sex with him
OK: its never happened to me
18andabove: heaven didnt shake...lol
18andabove: ok there's always a first time...
OK: I guess
OK: still waiting
18andabove: wat wld attract a guy to u?
OK: a guy to me
OK: I really dont know
OK: I get a lot of admirers
OK: they all say different things
OK: but mostly say cos am beautiful and intelligent
18andabove: like what?...okay if thats difficult...
18andabove: cld u describe ur sef physically...ur hobbies, role models etc
OK: oh i think I answered ur question the other way round
18andabove: intelligient but not smart...hmm
OK: am average size
OK: I'd like to believe I've got everything proportionally
OK: I dont have any role models unfortunately
18andabove: lepa or orobo?
OK: neither
18andabove: okay then wat do u enjoy doing...
OK: reading when I get a chance to
18andabove: coke bottle, maltina, sprit
OK: writing
OK: obviously which covers blogging
OK: and internet forums
18andabove: yeah...
OK: cinemas
OK: swimming
OK: talking
18andabove: oh u' shd really be fit then...
OK: travelling
OK: but I hate flying
18andabove: talking...i love talking to...
18andabove: wats the last movie u saw?
OK: SATC
OK: going to see wanted this weekend
18andabove: ok so in SATC, which of the characters wld best describe u
OK: SJP
18andabove: ok then...so i have an idea now...
18andabove: staying there grants a sense of freedom...as in no really cultural indirance
OK: I guess
OK: here I can be who or what I wanna be
18andabove: u're sexy,intelligient...an academic but loves taking risks...\
18andabove: brb
OK: I take a lot of risk...too many for my own good
18andabove: like wat was the last one?
OK: some guy I knew was rubbish for me
OK: but somehow I was hanging on thinking what if I was wrong about him
OK: it was a huge risk cos i was still hurting from a relationship that had marriage on the horizon
18andabove: okay?
OK: turned out it was a bad risk
OK: but I woke up before things went too far though
OK: the guy is back on my case now but I've moved on
18andabove: isnt it funny that we usually ask u guys out immediately after a heartbreak...lol
18andabove: almost as if we're praying for it to happen?
OK: yea
OK: I know
OK: but i guess we are conditioned to be like dat
18andabove: yea...so have u ever had someone love u(well thats what they say) but u OK: Loads of times
OK: its sickening
OK: and at the same time disheartening
18andabove: yeah, tell me abt it...lol
18andabove: i get that a bit...lol
OK: because they are a lot more better than the sort of guys I fall for
18andabove: happens...
OK: but unfortunately they dont do it for me
18andabove: cause there's just not attraction
OK: exactly
OK: and we dont have much in common
18andabove: okay then
OK: but i did try to overlook that on one occasion
OK: thinking I could just work on myself
OK: but it turned out to be the biggest mistake ever
OK: after 6 months I was still struggling
18andabove: lol...ow long has ur longest relationship being?
OK: 3 years
18andabove: u try o...my longest was a year...
18andabove: wat abt shortest
OK: 2 weeks
18andabove: beat u...lol mine was a day...and it wasnt a one night stand o...
18andabove: she said yes in the morning....sex...we broke up amicabbly in the evening
18andabove: wat do u think i shd do?
18andabove: theres this chick really tripping for me but doent no ow to tell me...
OK: do you like her?
18andabove: and she has a 8yr old son
18andabove: u see we used to date....b4 she became pregnant years ago...
OK: what do u feel for her now?
18andabove: indifferenc
18andabove: so how do i tell her or show her that am not interested
OK: how does she show you that she still likes you?
18andabove: she comes around...
18andabove: she calls a lot...
18andabove: trys to be friendly with the family
OK: well stop picking her calls often
OK: when she comes around dont give her audience
18andabove: okay...
18andabove: wld u date someone that has a 8 yr old son?
OK: yup
18andabove: u wld...even though he belongs to another woman...\
18andabove: thats serious o
18andabove: anyways me i cant sha
OK: he doesnt belong to another woman
18andabove: the son i mean
OK: he will be fully divorced from her or whatever
OK: of cos
OK: that doesnt matter
18andabove: ehn ehn...as long as he loves u abi...
18andabove: one of u called me a small boy yesterday when i said i wanted to ask her out
OK: lol
OK: well you probably are not what she goes for
18andabove: okay i'm 5 6, fine boy,and all the adjectives u used for ursef earlier...
18andabove: why wldnt u want me...
18andabove: not u in this case, but ladies
OK: there's more to a guy than his physically attribute
OK: and 56" is not tall for a man
OK: most women like tall men
18andabove: yeah i know...ehn thank you...lol...
18andabove: funny that the women i've dated were always taller
18andabove: capable?
OK: of cos
OK: capable yes
OK: earns enough money to take care of their material needs like i said
18andabove: i hope u're not thinking wat am thinking?
18andabove: ok...money,money,money
OK: of cos
OK: its tradition in Nigeria
OK: men are brought up to work for the money
OK: women are brought up to spend the money
18andabove: so to be a big boi...u've got to be capable..
18andabove: although i dont know wat u mean by that...
18andabove: then u've got to have more...in short be comfortable...
18andabove: spend all the money?
OK: for most girls
OK: but I dont give a toss about a guy’s money
OK: as long as he can pay his own way
18andabove: u sure...lol
OK: we're cool
18andabove: abi o...
OK: although i wont deny it does help if he has a bit more to spare
18andabove: lol...so she's called me a small boi, abi
18andabove: so how do u change that impression when thats already ow she thinks?
OK: Use a different tactics
OK: act like u not interested in her
OK: become a friend first
OK: do stuff together
OK: just as friends
OK: and hopefully she may start to warm up to you
OK: but this is not a guarantee
18andabove: friends...ah...she'll just think u want to stay friends...
18andabove: okay...u already said its not a guarantee...but wld work for u i guess
OK: possibly
OK: not in all cases
18andabove: ok...i,ve u called someone a small boy b4? or looked at them that way?
OK: I have
OK: but that was then
OK: if i call someone a small boy now, it would be because I think he's too young to want the sort of commitment I want
18andabove: ehn ehn...
18andabove: thought age was nothing but a number?
18andabove: u cld date someone younger cldnt u?
OK: i could date someone younger
OK: only if we are on the same page
OK: if he wants the same things i want
OK: and he understands my thinking
OK: otherwise there's no point
18andabove: ok...like 8 yrs younger?
18andabove: just pray he doesnt call u aunty one day...lol
18andabove: BUT ITS REALLY NOT EASY FOR US WORKING CLASS TO MEET SOMEONE ABI?
OK: 8 years?
OK: humm no
OK: I can only do maximum of 3
18andabove: okay then
OK: so is the interview over?
OK: lol
18andabove: no we're just getting started...
18andabove: u tired already?...if u want to stop no problem...
18andabove: but i think the major questions are next
OK: ok
OK: i got the next 40 mins before i leave work
18andabove: shd we rush this or we'll talk tomorrow or monday?
OK: rush it
18andabove: ok then
18andabove: APART FROM WEDDINGS WERE IS IT SURE BANKER THAT U CAN GET A SINGLE BABE
OK: Anywhere
OK: church
OK: uni
OK: work
OK: parties
OK: on the street
OK: car wash
OK: library
OK: thru a friend
OK: on the internet
18andabove: by sms dating...
18andabove: by using my service...
18andabove: so apart from watching tv, what does a girl...sorry lady like u do, when u come back from work
OK: internet and talking on the telephone
OK: i dont do much after work unless of cos am meeting a friend
18andabove: i thought u'd say "start getting ready for a date"
18andabove: lets say u were going for one, what preparations wld u make?
OK: same ol
OK: am not vain
OK: as long as i smell nice and my nails look pretty
OK: am good
18andabove: lol...ok...so wld u want to go where he likes, or where u like?
OK: I can go anywhere
OK: cos am so indecisive I normally let him make the decision
18andabove: so in what direction wld u want the conversation to go...when u guys are talking
OK: I dont like to feel restricted
OK: we shud talk abt everything and anything
OK: but nothing too intimate
18andabove: SO WHAT WLD BE A CONVERSATION KILLER
OK: Am a very liberal person
OK: nothing could kill a conversation
OK: i want to know as much as possible so that I can place the person
18andabove: SO WLD A KISS ON THE 1ST NIGHT BE IN ORDER?
OK: if i like him, yes
OK: if i don’t, no
18andabove: OKAY SO IF HE MADE AN ATTEMPT,HE'D PROBABLY GET A SLAP...LOL
OK: nope
OK: am not a rude person
OK: I'll probably let him kiss me chastely on the cheek
OK: just not to bruise his ego
18andabove: BUT YOU'LL BE EXPECTING HE'S CALL AFTER THE DATE ABI?
OK: if i like him yes
OK: if i dont no
18andabove: SO WHEN IS THE CALLING TO EARLY OR TOO LATE...
OK: it doesnt matter
OK: things like dat dont bother me
OK: if he doesnt call by the third day i'd assume he's not interested in me
18andabove: WLD U EVER CALL A GUY U LIKE AS IN AFTER THE DATE?
OK: of cos
OK: its not all down to guys
OK: if you like a guy u've got to make an effort
OK: if he doesnt call me by the following day I'd call him
OK: if he doesnt return my call two days later then I'd move on
18andabove: want to paint a picture here...u're looking at this tall,dark and handsome guy...speaking good english....comfortable...
18andabove: he asks u for a date & u say no....somethings definately wrong...lol
OK: not necessarily
OK: do I like wot I see?
OK: if I dont, then it doesnt matter if he's tall and handsome
18andabove: so like ow many guys ask u out everyday...dont exagerate o...
OK: It doesnt work that way
OK: I mean am a very busy woman
OK: I dont come across guys who can stop me all the time
18andabove: okay lets say a week...
OK: but lets just say there are usually up to 3 men on my case at any one time
OK: I've never been toaster-less
18andabove: did u know that...the average single person goes on 22 dates, has 3 one-night-stands and three serious relationships before "settling down with The One."
18andabove: so ow do u rate...?
OK: Never had a one night stand
OK: I cant count how may dates I go one
OK: loads I guess
OK: and I've had 3 serious relationships so far
18andabove: lol...so they're almost right...
18andabove: wld u ask someone to marry u...
OK: I guess if we've been together a while
18andabove: wldnt that be the height of desperation
OK: nope
18andabove: okay then
OK: desperation doesnt come into it
OK: its cos u love someone and u guys are good together
18andabove: it wld be "love" as i guessed
OK: if he says no, tough
18andabove: u just go on living life shey?
OK: of cos
18andabove: whats the significance of a kiss to u...?
OK: it shows intimacy
OK: such that you dont get from sex
18andabove: so which wld u prefer...the kiss or sex
OK: it depends
OK: they cant exactly be compared
18andabove: guess it depends on ur mood and the fellow involved
18andabove: so what 1st comes to ur mind when a guy invites u to his place
OK: before nothing
OK: just to hang out and have a chat
OK: but these days I believe he wants to have sex
18andabove: ehn ehn...really...thats
OK: so unless am prepared to have sex with him, I dont go
18andabove: lol\
18andabove: What wld you and your partner argue about?
OK: timeliness and orderliness
18andabove: his abi...lol
OK: yes his
18andabove: How do you know your guy loves you?
OK: you never really know when a guy loves u
OK: love means different things to them
OK: but if he's there for me always am ok with that
18andabove: i guess so...
18andabove: Could you attend you Ex-boyfriend wedding?
OK: yup
OK: most of my split ups have always been amicable
OK: except for the most recent one
18andabove: mine too...
OK: so perhaps i wont go to his
18andabove: wldnt go to there weddings though
18andabove: Is it possible to love two guys?
OK: yes...but you will definitely prefer one to the other
OK: but the thing is the one u prefer may not necessarily have a trait that the other person have which you really need
18andabove: possibly...the question really wld be...cld u doubledate?
OK: so its still a dilemma whichever way u look at it
OK: I cant double date
OK: not because am trying to be moral
18andabove: okay?...
OK: but because my emotions do overtake me sometimes
18andabove: ow?
OK: so it can only be one man at a time
OK: which really sucks
OK: I wish i could
OK: lol
OK: i get pretty emotional
OK: wanna see him
OK: spend time with him
OK: bla bla
OK: cant feel/want that for two peeps at the same time
18andabove:
with both or either one...
OK: too much to handle
18andabove: Wld you date a guy shorter than you?
What about one with a different religion?
What about one in a different tribe?

OK: one at a time
OK: I'd rather date a xtian cos i want to remain a xtian
18andabove: ok?
OK: but i never say never
OK: i'd rather date a yoruba man
OK: but i could consider other tribes
18andabove: ok thats abt it...
18andabove: there's just this segment that i like a lot...i say a word and u reply with the 1st word that comes to ur mind...
18andabove: ready?
OK: got just 3 mins
OK: can we do it in that time?
18andabove: we''ll be thru by then...
18andabove: takes abt one min
OK: start
18andabove: love
OK: seldom
18andabove: blue
OK: red
18andabove: sex
OK: heaven
18andabove: attraction
OK: important
18andabove: guys
OK: trash
18andabove: blogging
OK: therapeautic
18andabove: Insecurity
OK: sucks
18andabove: Obsession
OK: danger
18andabove: Relationships
OK: great
18andabove: capable
OK: excellence
18andabove: Commitment
OK: great
OK: got to go now
OK: am out
OK: later
18andabove: okay bye
18andabove: thanks alot...

monday 16-06-08 (finally)

yeah i 've been around...had a lot of things to talk about but was just to lazy to blog...
i still want to continue with this diary though and i'll find time to fill in the days i missed...
i just didnt want to blog,i have a very short attention span and if i've been blogging for this long, i probably will be able to get to the end of the year Insha Allah...yes my attention span is 6 months at the most and if i get past that it'll be 3 years...its helped me in business,relationship and life as a whole...i'm just looking for the next thing...

i've been a couple of delimma's in the last few days...starting from that trip to owu falls,

i didnt know that keeping a daily diary was this difficult at least i tried sha, my paper diaries are just filled with tips, quotes, my jottings from classes and the books i read...yes i dont write stuff in my paper diary...i just use it to keep notes...yeah yeah i'm just rambling abi...i'm letting my thoughts out for the 1st time in a while...

i have role models, mr Richard branson and Mr donald trump, wonderful individuals, successes in business, billionaires and...have divorced atleast once...shey u understand where i'm coming from...anyways i'm like if i wasnt to be like this individuals, does that mean i'm going to marry more than one wife?and if yes,who 1st?

anyways...i get to ilorin and call sexy, i got all the info about owu falls from her...she's so surprised that i'm in ilorin,i'm surprised too...soemthing in me's telling me that i took this trip just because of her and not cause of owu falls...well thats a part of it...i do this kind of crazy things for the women in my life...lol...

and thats the point,i'm i living the life i want or living this life because of the way a woman is dictating it,i'm i basing my decisions based on wanting to be a success in my relationship 1st or a success in life...because ultimately if its about the woman...i'm going to lose...

sha, i finally get to meet sexy, a lot bigger than her picture, and we end up getting close to having sex...i couldnt because i'm thinking, distance is going to be a major factor in this relationship and she isnt what i want,honestly, i too have a list for my ideal woman and 1st and foremost i want a woman that i can share stuff with, then she must also be near...near enough for us to go on a date in an hour...not one that lives 5 or 6 hours away...i also didnt want to take her for granted cause she loved me...she did, and okay she was a virgin...i couldnt bring myself to have sex with her when i knew i wouldnt want to have a relationship with her...and no its not about std's or aids, its just that this stuff that people do lackadisically, i see as a convenant...yeah think me weird but u just dont have sex with any and everyone...period...

anyways, i get back to Lagos,after risking my life on the Ibadan to Ilorin one lane road...and i call her...my dear, we just have to break up...this couldnt possibly work...she sees reasons with me and that was it...she's now in the past although i miss her so much now...miss her big nose,small breasts,musk perfume...most of all i miss her smile and squeaky voice...i also miss her long natural hair...yes o no bi attachement...anyways as i said she's in the past and unlike others i dont make friends withe exes...when its done its done...i'll only hear from u when u call...
dont go out of ur way to call people that'll just endure talking to u and u bring memories...

thats that...i let that out...

thsi got me thinking about the other women in my life...those i could possibly marry...thing is i dont really think this women care about me...well apart from one...lets call her d, shey i told u that my brother's birthday was saturday in ibadan and yes he's having his 5th wedding annervarsary...oppurtunity to see the family again, to here the latest gist and to present D to the family...yes Other memebers have to meet her 1st before my mum...anyways, D shows up late...in a suit for this kind of party?...and i have to practically force her to meet the folks...and the judgement i got wasnt good...in short, i couldnt present her to mum unless, i feel in love with her,she uses jazz on me or , i really damn what they all say...

i ask myself why i'm i doing this to myself,why do i want to go out with someone who i might not marry?...why do i think marriage will solve a major challenge which i have which is practically becoming a success in business...

and dont go saying, shebi u run a mobile dating service, u could get another one.....
know my dear it doesnt work that way...there always has to be a connection...even if i meet 20 babes in a day,i'll only hope and pray she's the right one...

i'm already tired again although i have lots of other stuff to add maybe later...

let me just read this information about getting a visa to the us, i want to go on a short visit to see a friend...

thats another thing i want to reduce, i want to stop this my information overload...i read everything,books,magazines,blogs... listen to different kind of music,jazz,hip hop,soul,i'm really into pasuma now even though my colleagues at the office think i'm too tush to listen to fuji; watch all the programs on tv...aargh...maybe i shd take a break from all this stuff sef i'll just miss watching salvadore in the second chance...the uefa championship matches...hip tv...prime time jamz...well i have to stop one way or the other sha...

shey i've written abou tmy business yet, well okay...i will be removing a few stuff from my blog although earlier in the week i wanted to close it down...hopefully what'll be left will be original content...and i'm procastinating a lot when it comes to my business...i'm always trying to move it to the next level...always...always...well one day with the help and patronage of u guys it'll be possible...

i've been thinking abt all what is happening in my life right now...did i tell u that the event on saturday was at my brother's house...he's almost completed it...and then i learnt that my friend had moved to his own flat and now has a car...i'm happy for them, but the question that came to my mind was Olohun, when will it be my turn?...he answered in various ways before the end of the weekend...he's like Omo mi,In the marathon called life, you're not racing against opponents, you're in this race against yourself...
Later,He's like Patience,Patience...

and finally he's like what do u really want in life...
what steps are u taking to get what you want...
what wld u give up to get what you want...
thats the koko o...

i know what i wld give up sha,that thing that we guys usually do to or without ourselves when we are aroused...its a bad thing, often develops into a habit and ruins stuff...i didnt use any word o...
i wld also be willing to give up having sex till a later date...
i wld give up taking in all this information...
i wld be willing to give up chocolate..."sob"
i'd even be willing to give up asking the ladies (i probably wouldnt marry) on a date...

why is it that we often plan a lot when we dont have money,,,,then when the money comes we just discard them and go do wat we like with the money...i bet it takes self discipline abi,well i have to take time out to really develop that...

yeah, i havent updated the singles corner for a while and i will be for the end of the day...i have lots of exciting people i'd like u guys to meet...and i'll be adding a small questionaire on how to improve on the service on the side of my blog and will also be sending it to your mobile numbers...your answers and observations will be appreciated...i'm also working on a 18andabove t-shirt, working on other trips to tourist attractions...also putting in place a system by which you could advertise your products or services on 18andabove and its affiliates...

didnt know it costs this much to want to go to the us o...

work sef hasnt been really lively for me...i'm tired of still working here...its 3 years already and u wldnt beleive that i said i wasnt going to use more than months...the whole work i do at work isnt up to 3 hours out of 8 and i spend the rest of the day chatting with pple i'm not feeling at all or browsing stuff that i wouldnt probably remember tomorrow...damn

Why More Than 75% of Men Can't Attract Women

So many guys think you can improve your sexual quality by learning
all sorts of special techniques. Sure, those are nice - but they're
closer to window dressing than the heart of the matter. What you
REALLY need to do is engage her brain, activate her fantasies - and
become that which TRULY turns her on.

You'll like this exercise

I want you to close your eyes. I want you to close your eyes and
continue reading through squinty eyelids that you shut whenever you
get enough info to run with it.

Now, I want you to think of the HOTTEST image you can.

It can be something you've done, something you've seen done, or
just something you've dreamt of doing.

Paint the full picture. Really let yourself go, get randy, get to
the point where it's tough to just sit there without doing
something ABOUT this amazing fantasy.

Once you've gotten the picture firmly in your head and you've, uh,
concluded it, take a few moments to reflect.

What was it about the fantasy that turned you on?

It's not the size of the wave, OR the motion of the ocean?

Now I don't claim to have ANY idea what you personally find
exciting, but I'm prepared to make a few generalities that will
almost CERTAINLY apply.

It might have been location-specific, or person-specific, or
attitude-specific.

But it wasn't technique-specific.

What I mean by this is, you might have been on a secluded beach
with three other ladies lapping at you - but you weren't concerned
with the exact motion of the flicks of their tongues (even if you
know it through vivid imagination).

If you were making out, it might have been the EXCITEMENT of doing
it in a hotel pool with lots of balconies around - but not the
pattern of suction she applied to your lips.

Or if you were eating sushi off some naked Asian beauty, it was the
fact that you were EATING SUSHI OFF SOME NAKED ASIAN BEAUTY, and
didn't have much to do with how you held the chopsticks.

Where are we going here?

Technique isn't important. Ok, it's important - but only in a
secondary kind of way.

You've been duped too long!

'Wait,' you think, 'What about Susie Q. who did this thing it drove
me wild, that was technique!'

Yeah, that can happen. But only when you already LIKE someone, for
the most part. Susie Q. already got you excited - so you were
LOOKING for something to turn you wild. You were just helping her
along.

Now, there are rare instances of a woman who has such AMAZING
technique that she'll keep her men around just for that.

But trust me, those are EXTREMELY rare instances, both because of
the skill necessary and because, well, most men need something MORE
than the pure physical pleasure of pleasing touches.

Don't get me wrong, the pleasing touches are wonderful - they just
can't do the job alone.

Now, bearing in mind what it is that REALLY turns men on, remember
this - for women, it's even MORE about the fantasy and LESS the
physicality.

Up to ten times more, in some cases.

And what is it that most books or programs try to teach a man to
help his sex life?

Yep, techniques.

Hey, it can be handy to know the 1 o'clock hot spot or the Frisbee
hold... in the same way it can be handy to know where the salad fork
goes.

These things can help make an event that much more special, but if
you can't COOK, they don't mean much.

So, sexually, how do you COOK?

Simple. You've got to plug into your lady's brain.

Engage her mind, find out and then ACT OUT her fantasies. Don't
worry so much about stroke order until you've mastered the more
ephemeral parts of sex.

And how do you do that?

If I had to sum it up in two words, I'd say Inner Confidence.

You need to be so COMFORTABLE in your sexual skin that you RELAX
her. So OPEN and at ease that you bypass her nerves and shyness
(and most women - even gregarious ones - are shy when you get to
sexual fantasies).

You need to make her feel ok being open and vulnerable with you.
And you do that not through cooing and being a girlie-man - but by
being open and confident and completely natural about everything.

And then you need to LEAD her.

If her comfort and trust are what open the door, you've gotta take
her hand and help her through it.

Think about it - you can NEVER achieve this sort of openness and
freedom with another spontaneously or just because you WANT to - it
MUST be actively brought out by your partner.

And then, once you've got access to her fantasies, start making
them come TRUE. Trust me, if you truly get in her head, you can
make a woman orgasm without even TOUCHING her.

And if you've got a lady having that much fun, she's going to
INSIST on sharing the pleasure.

So now you know WHAT to do - the question is HOW?

Where's that recipe?

The answer is from WITHIN yourself. This is entirely an
inside-to-outside enterprise.

How Ugly Men Attract Women...

It's a sad fact of life that everyone out
there has some type of insecurity that makes
them feel "unattractive." Even the most
beautiful women in the world have stuff about
them that makes them feel ugly at times.

For men - their visual nature can often times
make them very critical of their own appearance.
There is always something that makes us
feel as though we are ugly.

Maybe it's the fact that we are too short,
or fat, or bald, or old? There are any
number of factors that make us feel "unworthy"
of the attentions of beautiful women.

But if that was the case - no one would ever be
able to attract a woman at all!

In fact, the next time you're out, take a mental
note of every guy you see with an attractive girl,
and try and appraise whether or not you think that
guy's looks are worthy of the girl he's with.

Sure, sometimes you'll find a guy who's with a
girl and they are both fine credits to their
species. But most of the time, what you'll
find is the guys with really hot and appealing
women range from "average" to "ugly" in the
looks department.

That's because beauty - in men - is the exception,
not the standard.

But more than that, men rely on factors OTHER
than their looks to help attract the kinds of
women they want to them.

There are three major factors that most men try
and utilize to the best of their ability when
attracting new and exciting women to them.
They are:

1. Wealth

2. Social Status

3. Personality

Let's go through these one at a time...

The first factor men use to attract the opposite
sex is their wealth, or finances. Proving one's
"provider" status to women is a sure fire
way to get female attention. After all, what woman
DOESN'T want to be pampered?

However, there is a big problem with this tactic.
First of all, not everyone is rich or wealthy, so
this factor is reserved for the few that are.
More than that, women often feel like you're
trying to "bribe" or "impress" them with your
wealth, and because of that, they will treat you
more like an ATM machine with feet, rather than a
loving, caring, mate.

Keep in mind that there is nothing wrong with
using financial success to draw women into you.
But unless you have the money in the bank to
do so, you can't rely on this method to get you
a good woman.

The second factor is social status. Women are very
attuned to the social hierarchy of things, so having
a "high status" around women definitely makes any
man more attractive.

This status comes from holding a certain position
of power. It could be an important job, some type
of fame, or just the esteem of your peers.

However, one of the difficulties with this is
that you need to be able to display social status.
You can't just tell someone "I'm a very important
person" and have them believe it. They have to
get a sense of it themselves, and sometimes your
situation is not conducive to communicating this
(like meeting a woman on the street for instance.
She has no idea who you are!).

Also - not everyone has a high social status. Some
people are content with maintaining a medium to low
level status. Where does that leave these people?

With the THIRD factor - that of Personality.
The thing I like about personality is that it's
something EVERYONE can use to attract the kind
of women they desire, and it doesn't matter
how much money you make or what your social
situation is like.

Having an attractive personality is the best
way for "average" or "unattractive" men to get
women interested in them. Being able to make
a woman laugh will turn her on more than a guy
with big muscles and a full head of hair.

Understand that women are slaves to their emotions,
and your personality is the method by which you
trigger emotions inside a woman!

The better your personality, the better you're
able to make a woman feel.

And your personality is something that can be
changed and cultivated over time. You can make
yourself into anything you want to be! It's
truly amazing how some "losers" can become
"rockstars" in the eyes of their friends and the
women they like just by tweaking their personality
a little bit.

So how do you do this?

The first step is to really work on your confidence.
The more confident you are, the better you're able
to display your personality.

Working on your social skills will also help you
to be relaxed and have fun around women. This
will create new opportunities for attraction.

And learning how to create strong emotional bonds
is also the best way there is to get a woman
emotionally attached to you.

What if?

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you
thought? Damn, i'm a fine boy

2. How much cash do you have on you? About 3k

3. Whats a word that rhymes with door? Small

4. Favorite planet? Earth

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your mobile? A client

6. What is your favorite ring on your phone? Beep

7. What shirt are you wearing right now? Checkered shirt

8. Do you "label" yourself? Yeah i do

9. Name the brand of shoes you're currently wearing? Pc's

10. Bright or Dark Room? Dark

11. What do you think about the person who took this survey? Dont even know the person who took the survey

13. What were you doing at midnight? Watching a movie

14. What did your last text message you received on your mobile say? My GTB bank statement

15. Where is your mail box? Dont have one

17. Who told you he/she loved you last? Sexy

18. Last furry thing you touched? Pillow

19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days? Fansidar,Paractemol

20. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed? pass!!!

21. Favorite age you have been so far? 27

22. Your worst enemy? Procasination

23. What is your current desktop picture? The company Logo

24. What was the last thing you said to someone? Thought you had gone home

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly? give me the money

26. Do you like someone? Yeah i do

27. The last song you listened to? 4 minutes by madonna

28. If the last person you spoke to was getting shot at, would you run? Yea

29. If you could punch one person right now, who would it be? I'd punch me

30. What is the closest object to your left foot? cables

thursday 05/06/08 (Virtual Reality)

Its a weekend and if you're like me,you've already made plans or you would of done by the end of the day.
Plans,who you're going to spend the weekend with mr who'll be spending it with you.
If you're a guy,you're assuming she's coming for the sex right,wrong,
she's coming to be mentally stimulated.
She's coming because she wants to be assured she made the right choice.

I dont know the cost of dating anywhere else in the world but i do know that in nigeria,you'd spend enough to build a house:-)lol
cost of dates:atleast one per month=N10,000
cost of gifts on birthdays:N30,000
cost of gifts on val's day:N50,000
transportation to her house:transportation to events:N20,000
condoms:N25,000
trip to the movies,zoo,etc:N50,000

The One Real Way To Get a Woman's Number

Derek, I met this hottie at a bar and we chatted
for a few minutes. Things were going well and we
were really clicking fast so I asked her for her
phone number.

She gave it to me...

Two days later I called her back, but no answer.
The next day I called her again and she picked
up... but her end of the conversation was stiff
and it seemed like she was blowing me off.

Derek, what happened? At the bar she seemed
interested. Where did I do wrong?

Raz


A lot of guys think that once they have a girl's
number, success!

Not so.

Just because you have a woman's number, it
doesn't necessarily mean much.

It's quite possible that the girl took a liking
to you, and you came across as cool dude. But a
RANDOM dude nonetheless.

Sometimes women are flattered when they are asked
for their number. So she gives it to you.

Sometimes women feel too guilty and bad to say
"no" because you seem like a cool guy and they
don't want you to think they're a bitch.

Even if, in the moment, she gives you her number
and she would like you to call her, it doesn't
mean that two days later when you DO call, that
she'll be in same headspace. The fire of the
moment is gone and now she starts to rationalize
reasons not to take your call.

That's why most of the phone numbers that men get
may be good for feeding their egos, but in
reality are worthless pieces of paper.

You could go up to dozens of women, give them a
compliment or ask for their opinion on something,
and then get their number - but 90% of the
numbers you would get this way would lead to dead
ends and message machines.

So what's the key to getting QUALITY phone
numbers and not just quantity?

Most throwaway phone numbers are a result of the
man getting the number too fast.

First of all, if you're at a bar and meet a girl,
don't talk to her for only five minutes and then
jump for the phone number and leave thinking
you're going to score. After all, what's the
point of getting a phone number in the first
place... to meet up later and continue the
seduction, right?

But you had her right there at the bar, right
THEN. You could have used that opportunity to
seduce her right THEN. You were on a "date" with
her right THEN. So getting a number so that you
can meet up with her later, and walking away from
the interaction in the moment is totally
counterproductive and nonsensical.

Also, if you get her phone number without going
through the proper preliminary steps, then yes,
the girl might be digging you, but in reality you
didn't have enough social value to her for her to
want to start an ongoing, dating relationship
with you.

A girl who with a social value of 8 might give
her number to you if she perceives you to have a
social value of 6... but that doesn't mean she'll
follow up with you.

Phone numbers are only solid when you both have
the same social value.

If you both have the same social value, she'll be
WAITING and HOPING for you to call.

So BEFORE you get a woman's phone number, you
want to make sure that you have at least equal,
if not more social value than her.

That means having social proof if possible, using
the nonverbal sexual cues, entertaining and
leading her peer group, lowering her social value
by temporarily ignoring her or teasing her,
dressing well, ignoring social pressure, and so
on... all the methods that build social value in
a woman's eyes.

Then, once she's given you a few green lights,
start screening her. If she passes your
screening, accept her. Then isolate her if she's
not alone with you already.

NOW you can get her number.

Basically, if you want a SOLID phone number that
will have the girl waiting and hoping that you'll
call, don't even both getting it until the girl
has shown you a number of green lights and you've
screened her and she's tried to pass your
screening.

WHAT WORKS BETTER THAN PHONE NUMBERS

Instead of getting a woman's phone number,
propose an "instant date" right on the spot.

After all, why would you meet up with her up
later for a date when you could go on a date with
her RIGHT NOW?

If you're on a campus, invite her to go to the
bookstore with you and have coffee.

If you're at a bar, invite her to go to Denny's
restaurant for nacho chips with you.

If you're at the mall, tell her you need some
help picking out a shirt.

Or you can even instant date her to her apartment
if it's nearby - because you just have to show
her your aquarium and the pirate crab with only
one claw (or use whatever other excuse you can
come up with).

When you score an instant date you're no longer
just "some guy she met at a bar" but rather you
become "a guy she's been on a date with". To a
woman's mind, it's a much stronger position for
you to be in.

If she declines the instant date, instead of
getting a number, schedule your first date right
then.

Say to her, "Well Thursday I'm busy because I
promised my friend Jennifer I'd help her move...
but Friday I'm going to be hitting the beach with
some friends. You can come too, it'll be a
blast."

Or tell her, "You like comedy don't you. I'm
thinking of going to this comedy show Friday
night... I've been wanting to see it for weeks
now and I hear the guy is hilarious. You'll bust
your ass laughing."

Have a cool date idea prepared and ready to go
BEFORE you go out so that you have something to
fall back on in case nothing comes to your mind
in the heat of the moment.

Also, try to couch it like you're inviting her to
something you were going to do ANYWAY, even if
she wasn't going to go with you. Couch it like
you're doing it is not dependent on her showing
up. You ALREADY have a cool and exciting life and
you're just inviting her along for the ride.

Once you've scheduled the first date right there,
THEN swap numbers.

Then it's natural to get her number so you can
keep in touch with her if your plans to change.
You're no longer getting her number to "date
her". You're already dating!

Also feel free to call her up later and CHANGE
the date plans on her. If you feel like it, call
her up and change the day or what you'll be
doing. After all, you're not tied to what you
already specified by some mysterious law of the
universe. Girls do this all the time to guys. And
it just makes it look even more like what you're
doing isn't dependent on her.

IF she resists going on an instant date with you,
AND she won't commit to setting up a date right
there and then, then fall back on swapping
numbers. However, this probably means that you
didn't build enough social value to her in the
first place and most likely the number will not
be worth the paper it's written on.

In fact, if you played the seduction right, SHE
should be volunteering HER number. You shouldn't
even have to ask for it.

Sometimes, just small tweaks in your methods can
seriously UP the success of your game almost
overnight.

thursday 290508 (Listen)

...it's just that very few people ever
learn to rely on it and properly listen to it.

What is this???

It's your intuition or "gut feeling" about something. Using your
"visceral thinking".

Everyone has an intuition... but some people's intuition and knack
for "visceral thinking" is far more developed because they don't
allow other urges or impulses to get in the way.

When you're dating, meeting people, or in a relationship, your
intuition is highly important.

Last night, on Sunday evening, a good male friend of mine stopped
by for a glass of wine. This man is personally successful, though
not necessarily financially successful-- but he is a character,
fun, and extremely self-aware and emotionally developed.

He was telling me about a woman he'd met and been on a couple of
dates with. They had gone out the night before, on Saturday. He
described her as being highly attractive, tall, thin, bubbly,
enthusiastic, with a loud, obnoxious laugh. He said that she owns a
small clothing boutique for women & children. But he said that from
the very first time he met her that something "just wasn't right".

Here is what he said: "I just couldn't help but think her need to
always present herself and be over the top, and her loud obnoxious
laugh is covering up for something. I just kept thinking that
something wasn't right. I had an awkward feeling around her."

Sure enough, when they went out on Saturday, she admitted several
things to him... She's been married twice, though she originally told
him she'd never been married. She cheated on her first husband--
and the man she cheated on him with she ended up marrying and that
was her second husband. She has a child with the first husband--
she originally told my friend that she didn't have any children.
Her husband has full custody of the child. She is running a decent
business, but her life is in shambles... it's apparent she drinks too
much, spends above her means, and parties too often and hasn't
gotten her life together.

She admitted these things to my friend when she had far too much to
drink and was crying and spilling her guts about how "awful her
life is".

None of these things came as that great of a shock to my friend.
Why? Because he already knew something wasn't right. Because he
knew something wasn't right, he had NOT been intimate with her, he
hadn't gotten his hopes up, and he already knew that she wasn't the
one for him.

He was going out with her to have fun, enjoy life, and have a few
laughs. He wasn't expecting anything or wanting anything... And this
revelation didn't come as any surprise.

He made sure she got home safely, told her goodbye, and knew he
wouldn't ever go out with her again.

He wasn't discouraged, because he knows that there are great women
out there and he will find one.

He wasn't disappointed because he already knew "something wasn't
right" and because of that he hadn't gotten his hopes up or thought
something might work out between them.

He hadn't been intimate with her or had done anything that he (or
she) would regret.

He could walk away from her calmly, rationally, optimistically, and
in a positive frame of mind because he listened to his intuition
from the get-go and he didn't let his desires, sexual impulses or
wishes, or hopes get in the way. He also is confident enough to
know that he can attract a great woman, that there are wonderful
women on this planet, and that he will find his special someone.

When you listen to your "gut feeling" and you have the confidence
and security to walk away from someone who "just isn't right"...
dating and relationships become a lot easier.



Shelley