The 10 Worst Things You Could Say To Your Boss

The daily reality of being a boss is hard work, thankless even. So why make life harder for the both of you. Heres a light-hearted look at some of the things you should avoid saying, unless you're hoping to pick up your P45!


"The alarm didn't go off -- again."
Everyone has days when the bus breaks down, the washing machine packs up or the alarm doesn't go off. The problem is that some people have those days every day and what really annoys your boss is your lame excuse. "It shows you don't care," says Louis Halpern, CEO at London ad agency Halpern Cowan. "Why they can't just tell you that they find it hard to get out of bed and be done with it I don't know. It really makes me furious."


"We could have gone somewhere nicer for the office party."
Bitching is bad; whining is worse. "What really annoys me is when we buy new equipment or take everyone out, and all I hear the next day is 'We should have bought a bigger TV' or 'We could have gone to a better restaurant," says Halpern. "And that's when we've spent £5,000."


"Yeah, whatever."
Your boss has to stay motivated all the time. So, when you fall asleep in meetings or show you can't be bothered to do something, it makes their job even harder. Your lazy attitude will also affect other staff around you.


"Isn't it time I had a pay rise?"
Before rushing to your boss and demanding a rise, you need to build a case why. Prepare a list of recent achievements that show how you've helped increase profits, improved efficiencies or saved costs. Be as specific as possible. If you're in sales, for example, note your year-on-year account comparisons, quarterly highlights and client wins.


"It wasn't my fault."
Problems can happen to anyone. don't pass the blame or deny the error -- youll be more respected if you own up and let your boss know what you're doing about it. For example, if you submitted a report and later discovered your figures were wrong, explain how you're contacting the relevant people to correct the information.


"Would you like to link to me on Facebook/LinkedIn?"
Never be tempted to invite your boss to become your social network friend. It's best to learn things about them much later -- or never at all. Keep personal and professional lives separate.


"That's not part of my job description."
If you don't have the necessary skills for a new project, admit this to your boss rather than act difficult. Discuss what help or courses you may need.


"I'm planning my wedding and too busy to take on any more work right now."
Never let your home tasks interfere with your job. You are paid a salary to work. If something personal is eating into your work life, ask your boss for time off or even a sabbatical.


"I'm leaving because I can't stand working for you."
What goes around comes around. Even if you hate your boss with a vengeance, always part on good terms because you're likely to need a reference from them. You may even end up working for or even with them again one day.


"Your breath smells/That tie's disgusting/Is that a photo of your wife or mother?"
Hmmm. Maybe you should consider brushing up on your diplomacy skills.


If tact isn't your strength, think before you speak. Being open and proactive can help make conversations with your boss easier and more successful. And never forget that the worst thing you can do is talk to everyone else but the boss.

wednesday march 26 2008 (silence)

at work yesterday,mistaken walked in on a colleague
watching porn...yes...lol...and this was the second
colleague within like 2 months...i thought i was the
only one that was guilty...to think that this were
people i respected alot...i hope it was just curiosity
and not an addiction starting for them...me have
stopped sha except for those once in a while peep...lol
come to think of it,should i tell them to delete it from
their history folder against all those audits? abi i
should help them do it because this guys are not
really computer savvy...do girls watch porn at the office too?

talking of girls,is it that chilvary is dead or that the
hustle and bustle of Lagos doesnt allow us to indulge in it?
well i took the brt bus yesterday...after i shut down our servers
without really checking if everyone had logged out,took a tongue
lashing from a superior...lol...sha where was i?, okay we were
all standing almost jampacked almost like sardine,reminisent of
the infamous molue,eventually some people alighted and i got a seat
i was trying to compose posts for my blog and i could feel stares,
i looked up and there was this chick eyes pleading for me to be a man
and offer her my seat...should i? shouldnt i?the normal me would have
offered her a seat,me right now wasnt just...so i could only smile...
felt a little bit bad but i still didnt get up...another oppurtunity lost
to make a good impression...

got home and settled down to watch the apprentice africa to learn a lil
bit more about entrepreneurship in africa...mum has been complaining
about my junior sister not staying at home since morning,her not buying
petrol for the generator (i hope a scarcity hasnt started again cause the
lines at the petrol stations have sure started).eventually she comes to
sit beside me,that usually means there's going to be news for me,it being
good or bad depended on how i took it...well i have a cousin or so,a single
mother,she had been squatting with friends and they were being evicted and...
i interjected..she should go and stay with my mum's elder sister because
i didnt think it was a good idea and dad wouldnt too...she said okay and
that she would inform my cousin...ironically at work, i was talking about
not marrying a single mother well except if she was angelina jolie or ini edo...lol

saw the apprentice africa and unconsciously i felt the ladies,matrix corp, was
going to win this time,which they did...they were told to propose a new mission statement
and a new advert for sahara energy...Mr Shobanjo was thrilling to watch as usual
and i think he got it right by firing the guy...cant remember his name now...
although it was really tight...the lesson i got today was that,make your opinions
and suggestions known while it can make a difference not after...

sha was chatting with richard branson around 12am my time...well i was listening
to an interview i downloaded onto my phone...lol...having a great time when s
called...she was one of them during my nysc in benin and we managed to still stay
in touch till now,before i go on..NEVER EVER START A RELATIONSHIP WITH A CORPER IF
YOU DONT WANT TO BE HEARTBROKEN...okay, so here she is telling me about her latest
escapade with another corper which ended disastrously...yeah the corper eventually
left her for someoneelse both distance wise and relationshipwise...this is her 3rd
corper relationship gone bad...i told it to her straight,just dont...it takes God's grace...
because usually its a year when youths just liberated from slavery (school and parents)
go all around sowing their wild oats...sha i think she got the message...

ALSO NEVER LIE IF YOU WANT A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP,well my cousin came over the
easter break,he's just a year or two my senior and he already has pressure
to get married,he's mum doesnt approve of a 5 year relationship he has with an
akwa ibom chick,a yoruba chick or nothing,but the problem lies in the fact that
most of the yoruba chicks he has met,he eventually leaves because of the slightest lie,
do you think he's ever going to get married?lol...
maybe it runs in the family because he's elder brother broke a record...em..."the
fastest introduction to family then breakup"thrice in a role..hope he keeps this one...

anyways got to work early today,mum changed her mind over the night the girl's coming
for just a month...i still dont think its good news...maybe because he paid a part of
the rent abi, or because shes my mum and she eventually gets her way like all of us...lol
sha am downloading podcasts now...tired of reading blogs...lol please read my own sha o...
make comments,use the mobile dating service,vote,call me if you want to...
ehn ehn i just heard of the scottish call...a flash means yes while two flashes mean no....
eg am i still single,just flash once...lol

just got back from a meeting with the md...lol...it wasnt funny...
he charged us to do so much in a short time...and if we didnt...i know no o

got to go now

45 questions

Whats your name spelt backwards?: yttejjoknaT
What did you do last night?: Watched tv and thinking about new business
The last thing you downloaded onto your computer?: Richard Branson audio book
Have you ever licked a 9 volt battery?: No,might try it sha
Last time you swam in a pool?: E don tey o
What are you wearing?: Light blue shirt with blue jeans....got a thing for jeans right now
How many cars have you owned?: None
Type of music you dislike most?: emm music by micheal bolton and phil collins cause i cant really differentiate it
Are you registered to vote?: yes
Do you have cable?: emm not yet
What kind of computer do you use?: acer at work and toshiba laptop at home
Ever made a prank phone call?: no
You like anyone right now?: myself 1st...sorry if am selfish...lol
Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving?: i'd prefer bungee jumping
Furthest place you ever traveled?: Ondo
What's your favorite comic strip?: Basket mouth
Do you know all the words to the national anthem?: Yeah
Shower, morning or night?: mornings...but at night if its really hot
Best movie you've seen in the past month?: Resident evil...the 3rd part
Favorite pizza toppings?: mushrooms
Chips or popcorn?: Popcorn
What cell phone provider do you have?: GLO...rule your world
Have you ever smoked peanut shells?: No
Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?: No
Orange Juice or apple?:apple
Who were the last people you sat at lunch with?: my junior sister
Favorite chocolate bar?: dont know the name even though i eat it everyday...well almost
Who is your longest friend and how long?: D...24 years
Last time you ate a homegrown tomato?: e don tay small o
Have you ever won a trophy?: none
Favorite arcade game?: played arcade once...at zoes on opebi then
Ever ordered from an infomercial?: no
Sprite or 7-UP?: 7 up...you can use it as agbo too
Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school/work?: Yes!even passed my primary school aon saturday...it looks really small now
Last thing you bought at Walgreens?: where?
Ever thrown up in public?: no
Would you prefer being a millionaire or finding true love?: emmm...i'd prefer the money...being a millionaire please
Do you believe in love at first sight?: no
SPONGEBOB OR JIMMY NEUTRON?: jimmy...dont like spongebob at all
Did you have long hair as a young kid?: no
What message is on your voicemail machine?: none
Where would you like to go right now?: home
Whats the name of your pet?: none.
What kind of back pack do you have, and what's in it?: none
What do you think about most?: how long it would take me to get a better job or to be successful in business

review of nigerian mobile dating services

In the next few days i would start reviewing the few nigerian mobile dating services, am sure i would be deemed biased for even attempting to start it since i run a service of my own,am going to do it anyways and i'll try to be as objective as possible.your comments would also be appreciated.

When we had decided to start our own service,we had to look around to see if anyone was already into it,we really searched and the first service we got was that run by city people magazine.It was been run by aunty kemi or so.the premise was really simple,if you needed someone,you sent your details and that of the ideal guy or babe to a mobile phone number,there was also a landline number you call.
e.g i am chichi,25 years a student of unilag,dark,busty,tall and i would like a man that is tall,dark and handsome,God fearing and with a sense of humour.he can call me on 0803xxxxxxxx.
the "advert" would be featured in the next edition of the softsell.then the calls would start coming in from potentials.
(we got most of the irst few numbers in our database here apologies to mr kehinde)

advantages>you had easy access of getting a date.It was widely used been the first of its kind

disadvantages>most of the individuals who used the service wanted sugar daddys or mummys purely for monetary reasons
you also had to wait till the tuesdays before you could access the profiles of users
profiles were added at the whim of the editor.

Hamilton rates win as best of his career

Lewis Hamilton has described his work in winning the Australian GP as the best of his career.
On an afternoon that saw World Champion Kimi Raikkonen made two critical mistakes, Hamilton didn't put a wheel offline as he began the new season in the best possible style. The Englishman's serene progress towards the chequered flag was in start contrast to the chaos that occurred behind his McLaren - and it was the faultless professionalism of his performance that gave the youngster particular satisfaction.
"This win perhaps feels better than any because I feel I've improved in many areas," he explained.
"I wouldn't say it's the perfect win but I think in terms of managing my tyres, controlling my pace and confidence and being comfortable in the car, it's the best race I've had so far," Hamilton said.
It remains to be seen whether Hamilton has taken a nine or ten-point lead over Raikkonen, but in any case the McLaren driver is convinced that he has a package to challenge - and beat - his archrival.
"We could have gone quicker so I am not bothered by Ferrari's pace," he insisted. "The car was phenomenal, a dream to drive compared to the car we had last year

Ashton 'punks' the media

Ashton Kutcher is up to his old tricks again - but instead of playing tricks on celebrities, he's working with them to turn the tables on the press.
Stories of Paris Hilton meeting with a bearded guru and Avril Lavigne sporting a potential small 'baby' bump turned out to be false, and merely promotion of Ashton's new show, Pop Fiction, which premiered on US channel E!
"I feel like we're undercover cops. I've always wanted to do something like this," said Avril in the first episode.
The 30-year-old Punk'd creator, who is married to Demi Moore, is credited as an executive producer on the show and has enlisted stars to play along with actors, such as Paris' fake guru, to poke fun at the paparazzi and fool the media.
"We're having fun," producer Jason Goldberg said of the project.
"But we want to say to people, 'Can you really believe everything you read and see?'"
Pop Fiction is shown on Sundays on E!

How to Score Some Big Points With Your Wife!

Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all.
He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he didsomething wrong.
Jack had to force himself to open his eyes and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!
Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror.
Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian"
He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son... What happened last night?"
"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.
Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??"
His son replies, "Oh THAT! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, I'm married!!"
Broken Coffee Table: $239.99. Hot Breakfast: $4.20. Two Aspirins: $.38. Saying the right thing, at the right time. . . PRICELESS!!!
Find more hilarious humor at: http://makesyoulaugh.blogspot.com

My Sex Post

This is my own response to the furore created over Overwhelmed Naija Babe's post. I'm doing this simply because I hate the hypocrisy that has trailed the original. To the people she tagged (those on her blogroll), I think you are all fucking cowards. You all visit her blog for fun, you all voted her in Taurean Minx's awards, and y'all are now leaving her to bear the brunt of religious nuts alone? Show her some support in real terms. Do the shyte.

honestly dont know what all this is about,but since this post is going to be controversial in itself, fuck it...

1.) How old were you the first time? 22
2.) Name of your first? Mary or so...think that was her name
3.) Good or Bad? Bad. We were so much in a hurry not to get caught...lol...i even forgot that i had to "pour" outside.
4.) Name of the worst and why? probably the one above
5.) Name of the best and why? Probably be Stella...well she surprised me.
6.) Weirdest place you ever had sex? Wasnt weird...hmm just daring...in her room while the other girls were just outside the door.
7.) Favourite Position: Face me i face you...?dont know the name...lol
8.) Ever fake an orgasm? No...would like to learn though....
9.) Would you admit it if the person asked? Yeah if i could fake it..lol
10.) Favourite time of day to have sex? Just before dawn
11.) Most times you have had sex in one day? Think it was 3...
12.) Same person? Yes.
13.) Ever fantasize about someone other than the one you’re with? Often think of my exs
14.) Restrictions during sex? No bounding pls
15.) Accessories? Nada
16.) What? What?
17.) Done it in the rain? Where...when am not mad...lol
18.) Done it in a car? hopefully sometime soon...heard its cool
19.) Had a Threesome? No
20.) Want to have sex now? No.
so now go ahead and judge me...am sure you wish you were me....better still copy this on your blog and answer it there...IF YOU DARE

Building the Perfect Profile

Daters tell Andrea Syrtash about what works and what doesn't in online dating. See her tips for creating an online dating profile that attracts the people you really want to meet.

I answered the phone last week, and without even a hello my friend barked, "He looked NOTHING like his photo and was about a decade older!"Sound familiar?The number one complaint online daters have is that the person they meet is completely different than the person depicted on the dating site.

Writing your online dating profile is like writing a good cover letter in a job search Writing your online dating profile is like writing a good cover letter in a job search -- its sole purpose is to capture the reader's interest so that he or she wants to meet you and learn more. You can market yourself effectively without inventing a whole new persona.Online daters come across many profiles, so it is important to distinguish yourself. Believe it or not, simple things like checking your spelling, posting a good photo, and keeping the write-up concise and upbeat can be the difference between someone following up with you, or clicking onto someone else.
Here are some other 'dos' and 'don'ts' to keep in mind when you're constructing your dating profile:

Do Post Photos
Most people miss the boat if they don't include a photo in their profile. Most people miss the boat if they don't include a photo in their profile. If you're too shy to include one upfront, make it clear that you will offer the photo if you feel a connection with someone who writes to you. You should be aware that many, if not most, people won't even look at a profile if there isn't a photo included with it.
Don't Post Many Photos
I know you have many cute looks -- on the go, with your family, or with that really great tan last year in Mexico -- but resist the urge to post more than a couple of photos or else you'll overwhelm your audience who won't have a clue which photo you actually look like now.[Editor's note: Yahoo! Personals allows you to post up to 10 photos with your profile and add captions to each so you can clear up any confusion about when a photo was taken. However Andrea's advice is correct. Don't confuse viewers about what you look like now.]
Post a Photo of Yourself Solo
Your niece may be really adorable or you may want to show that you hang out with cute members of the opposite sex, but it's better to stay solo in your photo online -- and on that note, don't include a photo where you've cut off someone's arm wrapped around you. C'mon! Digital cameras make it easy to get at least one good shot of you on your own!

Create a Compelling Essay
DO be concise but specific to ensure you capture the reader's interest. Instead of saying, "I love to travel" mention the best trip you've ever taken. Replace "I have a good sense of humor" with something witty. Bottom line: show don't tell!
DON'T justify why you're online and say things like, "My mother made me do this but I hate online dating" Stay upbeat and humorous and you're more likely to get noticed.
DO have someone else (preferably of the opposite sex) proof your profile to make sure it flows, highlights your best qualities and is free of spelling and grammatical errors.Remember -- online dating is like speed dating -- you have a very small window to make your impression.Finally, a note about honesty -- not telling the truth about your relationship status, the way you currently look, or exaggerating certain characteristics has become the cardinal online dating sin.My friend insists that the majority of men who post their height at 5' 9" are often 5' 7" or under and many women who post 29-years-old are actually over 30. It's generally not a good idea to embellish too much since a big part of dating is about expectations. It's generally not a good idea to embellish too much since a big part of dating is about expectations. And really, do you really want to start out dating someone new by being dishonest?It is true that online dating can be like a big bargain sale -- you may have to sift through some junk to find the gems.
Don't let that deter you. There are some amazing people waiting to meet you online. Have fun!

Born in Toronto, Canada, Andrea Syrtash has been living in the United States for almost a decade. Andrea served as special editor for two books, "How to Survive the Real World" and "How to Survive Your In-Laws", and has written and lectured extensively on dating and living your best life. She has offered advice on NPR, in USA Today, as a writer for The Huffington Post and on NBC's Today Show. A graduate of The Coaches Training Institute, Andrea has been working with clients as a Life Coach over the past few years. She writes and hosts a dating advice show, ONDating, produced by NBC Digital Studios for ON Networks.

8 First Date Tips for Women

First dates are all about getting to the second date. Here's how to make him fall all over himself for a second date with you

As a love coach, I've heard the following question more times than I can remember:"What happened? I'm so confused. At first, he seemed to really like me. He made reservations, picked me up, and took me to a fabulous restaurant. But for some reason, over the course of dinner, he became a little cold and distant. By the time he dropped me off, he seemed withdrawn and just sped off into the night. I haven't heard from him since! And I really liked him. I'm so bummed! What do you think happened?"Does this sound familiar to you? If so, you may have broken some cardinal first-date rules without knowing it.

Here are eight tips to ensure that a first date will turn into a second if you'd really like it to:

Tip 1. Don't be negative about dating.
Why should a man pursue someone who isn't happy? It's ineffective manhandling to dump your dating disappointments on bachelor No. 3. Talking to a man about how awful dating is just begs the question, "Are you in therapy?" Talking to a man about how awful dating is just begs the question, "Are you in therapy?"
Manhandling Tip: Be a romantic challenge, not a mental health challenge.

Tip 2. Don't get tipsy.
Always maintain enough sobriety to assess your date's character. Practice restraint, and don't have more than a drink or two when you're out on a first date. Otherwise, how in the world can you possibly observe him and decide if he's remotely right for you?
Manhandling Tip: Always stay sober enough to remember how naughty you were the night before!

Tip 3. Don't talk badly about your exes.
I don't care if he cheated on you with your sister, don't recite a laundry list of grievances about your exes. This will only make you sound unavailable at best, or worse, wounded. Reveal your secrets when you're both on a beach in Hawaii or, better yet, engaged! Reveal your secrets when you're both on a beach in Hawaii or, better yet, engaged!
Manhandling Tip: We all have baggage. Keep it in the closet on first dates.

Tip 4. Don't spook your suitor.
Now is not the time to point out your physical flaws. Only bring these complaints to people who can actually do something about them, and not to men who will now be forced to lie to you if they possess good manners.
Manhandling Tip: Confidence is sexy! Sometimes, thoughts are for the inside.

Tip 5. Don't talk about your personal pet peeves.
Although your therapist might get butterflies inside when you talk about how traumatized you are by the staggering number of germs that thrive in public restrooms, the typical male will be horrified. You'll have violated the sacred air space of "romantic quality time" and these little monologues of strange pain will be as off-putting as if you started sorting unwashed laundry in a restaurant.
Manhandling Tip: You already know all about you. Keep your problems to yourself and get to know him.

Tip 6. Don't chase your date.
Never deprive a man of the thrill of the chase. Besides, it's so much fun being caught! A woman can always initiate a first tea date, but after that, it's up to a man to decide whether he wants to pursue you. Entice men, play with them, and then release them! Allow men to initiate and take the lead in moving your relationship forward.
Manhandling Tip: When men chase you, they're much less likely to fly away.

Tip 7. Don't keep squawking.
Don't feel pressured to try to fill up every second with meaningless chatter. If the conversation falls silent for a moment, don't panic, just let it happen. Natural pauses are sexy, and body language can be so much more powerful than words. Slowly smile at him and breathe. You may be surprised when he blurts out in the middle of a deliciously pregnant pause, "Come here and kiss me!"
Manhandling Tip: Remember, sometimes less conversation really is more.

Tip 8. Learn how to leave.
Anyone can be pleasant when they're enjoying themselves, but the true test of character is how one behaves when terribly bored Anyone can be pleasant when they're enjoying themselves, but the true test of character is how one behaves when terribly bored, or worse, treated shabbily. There's nothing to be gained by suffering through a terrible date, so if you're having an awful time, depart quickly and gracefully, without being rude. When you're itching to leave, say: "Thank you so much for meeting me. I think it's time for me to go on home, Jerome. (Smile) Take care." Extend your hand for a quick shake, swiftly turn on your heel and depart.
Romantic Rule: If you're on date number one and aren't having fun, release men back into the wild immediately.

Lauren Frances, author of "Dating, Mating and Manhandling: The Ornithological Guide to Men," is the founder of the Institute for Romantic Research and a love coach to countless women and men around the globe, including Hollywood celebs like Kate Walsh and Amy Brenneman. Lauren has been featured on Bravo's The Real Housewives of Orange County and Dr. Phil's Decision. She's on the Web at laurenfrancesphdd.com